Challenge #02460-F270: Like Humans Do
"Don't worry I based this defence system off a deathworlder immune system"
As I ask in a shaken voice, "What kind?"
It bares its teeth, that I later I learned it was a sign of affection. "Humans"
(A quick lesson to the immune system https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zQGOcOUBi6s) -- Anon Guest
The thing about Deathworlder immune systems, is that they evolved to deal with Deathworlder problems. As such, they could be viewed as needlessly complicated. They could also be viewed as deadly, hyperactive, and entirely too aggressive, especially with some of their 'kill or cure' tactics.
Thron nervously glanced at the Human who had installed the system. "It isn't going to immolate the entire base, is it?"
The reply was not disarming of Thron's concerns. "Only as a last resort. Residents and employees will get plenty of warning to evacuate before then. Shall I walk you through everything?"
It was only later that Thron realised that this was an offer of demonstration and not a volunteering of protection services. This, of course, was long after the explanation of how the fortifications worked.
"First, there's the exterior defences. Regenerating ablative armour, re-enforced with Hungry Caterpillar salvage systems designed to tear apart anything that hasn't sent in the randomly-generated passcode. Quick tip, don't just hand out key generators willy-nilly. If necessary, use your own shuttle system to meet up with the freight or passenger ships and ferry your stuff in from there. Scanners on the gates, of course, to pick up any and all anomalies, which will alert the drones to isolate them for a more personal analysis. Once inside, automated patrol bots circulate through all the public halls, seeking out any life forms that do not carry or have implanted the special RFID chips. Each one's key-coded to the individual and locked with their DNA..."
Already, this was sounding suitably secure.
"...in the unlikely event of anyone trying to sneak past that, the scanners on the patrol bots would be able to pick up a programmed clone, and thereby activate the more aggressive attack bots--"
Yikes. Thron had to ask, "What about hacking attempts?"
"Listen, we wrote all the programming in Assembler Code. If they can crack that nonsense, they've earned it. Hardly anyone uses that horseshit any more. For obvious reasons. On one hand, we have the most compact and unintelligible code in the known universe, on the other hand... it's the most compact and unintelligible code in the known universe."
"Oh," said Thron, "That means nobody will hack it, right?"
"Well they bloody shouldn't. We ran it through fifteen different encryption protocols. Nobody's getting at that guacamole but authorised programmers. We've got a semi-annual update schedule and a crew of hackers testing it at every turn."
Thron checked. The Human was still pleased with themself, and not -as the Humans themselves might put it- pulling their leg.
"We've got the best possible scrubber protocols on every entry and exit. People trying to get in via the sewers will have to sneak through klicks of pipes this wide," the Human demonstrated with finger and thumb. It wasn't a wide gap. Even the most flexible of Cephalopoda couldn't squeeze their way through that and expect to survive. "Everything in or out goes through scrubbers and sensors, and in the case of outwards waste, molecular disassemblers," said the Human. "We won't say it's impregnable, but we will say we'll patch any and all holes our dirty tricks team can discover."
Of course they would. These were Humans. The best way to break into an impregnable facility was to tell a Human that it was impregnable.
Thron could tell that their research and development team would likely encounter something amiss in the theme of 'auto-immune disease' before they encountered any threat from the outside. Therefore, there was only one thing to do...
Thank the Humans profusely and insist on on-site troubleshooting staff.
[Image (c) Can Stock Photo / tussik]
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