Challenge #02204-F014: Complex Organic Chemistry

Class five Deathworlders have Problems dealing with a planet which Flora contains a mysterious Plant (Wink Wink).
For them it is as deadly as Arsenic is for us.
Their reaction when Humans Line Up to colonise it -- Anon Guest

[AN: Going with convergent evolution because the chances of weed happening exactly as it happened on Earth, on another planet, are astronomical at best]

Things had been going badly for the latest J'krog colony. The world, verdant and unclaimed, had promised a plethora of food for their rising numbers, including the plant life. It promised such and lied. Vast numbers of warriors and young were falling sick and dying. Exposed skin blistered, burned, and went necrotic in rapid succession. Something on this plentiful planet was highly toxic to the J'krog.

J'krog were made to gather and hunt. Farming and science were not their strong suits. Their species more or less stumbled into space travel through a series of fortuitous accidents. Therefore, they sent out a call for help. There was no shame in seeking allies when the enemy could get past one's defences. It had taken the J'krog some centuries to learn that particular lesson.

The Humans were the one to answer the call with their curiosity and powerful investigatory tools. They soon found that the abundant plant life had chemicals they called 'cannabinoids', after one of their Terran plants that hosted most of the entire gamut as its defence strategies. The J'krog, whose homeworld hadn't come up with the poison, were naturally undefended from it. Allergic, in fact.

Then the Humans did something unexpected. "We've got a class four point five world in a neighbouring system. How about we swap populations? Humans have so many uses for this stuff, it's flakkin' scary."

"Uses? For a toxic substance?"

"Lol, have you met us?" Human Gar laughed. "Seriously, the cannabinoids are some of the less toxic stuff for us. There's a plethora of medical applications. Anxiety control, pain control, appetite control, energy control. Lots of helpful stuff. Then there's the portion of our population who just want to get stoned."

H'kthor had been following until Human Gar lapsed into Human Slanguage. "Hit with rocks?"

"Uh. No. Humans enjoy using this stuff for a certain kind of stimulation. It makes our brains malfunction in pleasing ways."

H'kthor considered this. It took some considerable time. "Have your species considered perhaps that you have been misclassified?"

The assembled humans laughed at that. "They classify us Deathworlders by their environment, not by their bad habits. You know that. But yes. There have been a lot of requests concerning the classification system."

The eventual colony swap took a total of three months, including transit. The Humans were immensely helpful, to the point of retrieving artefacts previously lost in the toxic shrubbery. Renaming happened, as it was wont to do. The ex-J'krog colony became planet Blayzit whilst the ex-Human settlement became the J'krothi word for Insane Asylum.

The Humans were greatly amused.

[Image (c) Can Stock Photo / Raimund79]

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