Challenge #01974-E150: Dangers Untold
Team Blue again. In this case Team Blue read fan fic. -- Anon Guest
Evo-era Nightcrawler stopped when he saw his face on a thing. It wasn't a comic book, not a book. It was thick and filled with lurid art and closely-set type. "Was ist das?"
"This is my zine," said the vendor, "Blue is My Colour. It's a collection from a bunch of fans. There's Kurtty in there as well as Kurmanda. I try to keep out the hate-fics on either of your girlfriends."
He flipped to a random page without some of the more... anatomically impossible art. Flipped back to the beginning. No, it still didn't make any sense. "I've never worked in a coffee shop," he said.
"Well, no," said the vendor. "That's what we call an A-U. Alternate universe. Coffee shop AU's are very popular, so I make sure there's a new one in every zine." She winked, "The hot stuff's three pages in."
He flipped three pages in, stared incredulously at the page, and made a noise like a horrified mouse. "Mein gott," he breathed, and then passed out.
Taako was the one to catch him. "CLERIC! We need a cleric over here!" Curiosity drew his eyes to the page, and it was his turn for his eyes to bug almost out of their sockets. He turned to glare at the vendor. "You let a literal child read THAT?"
She had the decency to blush. "Well... someone about the same age wrote it, so... Didn't think it was that bad."
"People in this reality are disgusting," mumbled Taako, trying to revive Evo-Nightcrawler. "C'mon, boychick. Come on back."
The Tick, coming to see what the commotion was about and attempting to do something heroic, picked up the book.
"Don't read it," Taako warned. "It's a c'thonic horror." Too late. Way, way too late.
The Tick's eyes bugged. His antennae stood on end. He muttered something along the lines of, "Heavens to murgatroid..." and then went from stunned verticality through a ninety degree transition to flat on his back. Still holding the offending zine.
"That thing should have a warning label," iced Taako.
[Image (c) Can Stock Photo / pathique]
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Best description of that drop I've read for a while, can see it clearly XD