Challenge #01902-E078: They Who Laugh Last
"I'm hungry !" / "Hi Hungry, I'm dad !"
"A man walks into a bar and says 'Ouch'."
"Why is a raven like a writing desk ? Because there is a 'b' in both and an 'n' in neither."
Those 3 English examples show perfectly why a "universal translator" is something impossible. You CAN translate it, but it will be incomprehensible.
Not convinced ? Here's a French example with a literal translation :
Que dit une maman baleine a son enfant qui fait trop de bruit ?
Cétacé ! (C'est assez)
What does a whale mum say to her child who makes too much noise?
Cetacea! (That's enough) -- Anon Guest
One would think, what with all the diverse languages in the Galactic Alliance, that comedy would not be a shared experience. Those people had not counted on two things: the ability of humans to make fun of themselves, and the ability of other peoples to find humans ridiculous.
Observational comedy, as it turns out, is almost universal.
"You want something manhandled to death, you make sure there's a human around, and then hang a sign that says, 'do not touch'."
Even the humans laughed at that one.
"Human pets are amazing. This is a species that took the wild wolf and turned it into a teeny tiny puff ball with the aggressive capabilities of a marshmallow." More laughter. "Give humans a century and the most dangerous creature known to civilisation, and we'll be seeing 'teacup' variants with cute, baby features. Give it time, give it time."
Some humans were elbowing each other.
"Oh flakk. I've given them ideas!" Laughter. "We have humans nudging each other in the audience, my fellow cogniscents. You know what that means?" A pause to let most of them recover. "They're gonna mate!"
Howls. Absolute howls of laughter filled the room.
Shayde nudged her near-constant companion and chief interference in her plans to have 'a wee bit of fun'. "Gotta admit, 'e's nailed us."
"Don't mate with your pets," continued the comedian. "We know that doesn't work."
"Eeeeuuuw," she chuckled.
"An unfortunate truth?" Rael murmured.
"Too unfortunate an' too true," she said, still wincing.
[Image (c) Can Stock Photo / Ikonoklast]
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