Challenge #01600-D139: Best in the BusinesssteemCreated with Sketch.

in fiction •  6 months ago

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[TITLE: Acme Showroom.] You know Acme - All those cartoons. Especially the 'Roadrunner" -- Anon Guest

It was pristine. It was flashy. This company, the architecture screamed, has made a lot of money. You should invest in this company, it said. It's a wise choice.

The objects of pride were on revolving plinths. They had never been used, and they were polished regularly. Everything looked like the pinnacle of engineering.

It was a wonder how this company got sued in the first place.

Tarren wandered through the glistening displays. Rocket sleds. Catapults. Actual rockets. Everything here looked magnificent. "So how is it that you're being sued by an anthropomorphic coyote?"

"I don't understand it, either," said Marvin Acme, owner, chairman, and CEO of Acme Incorporated. "Our catalogue is very precise, as are our instructions. Mr W. E. Coyote clearly mis-assembled and combined several of our products in ways that we do not recommend. He ignored our copious warnings and now he blames us."

"You're confident that you can win, then? Even though Coyote claims that the warnings are not legible?"

"We can show catalogues going back decades, all clearly stating that some of our products are dangerous when combined." Mr Acme opened a concealed door that revealed a library of past catalogues. "Pick one. Look at the first page."

Tarren did so, opening up the oldest catalogue on display. Right there on the first page was a bold typeface declaring that some Acme Products should never be used in combination with others. Experimentally, Tarren flipped to a random product. Right next to the product number was another bold-faced warning, specifically warning customers not to use this invention in combination with any of five others.

"We care about the safety of our customers," said Mr Acme.

"How can bird seed cause a magnet to misbehave?" wondered Tarren.

"We're still investigating that one," smiled Mr Acme. "The closest our engineers can get to a logical cause is, and I quote, 'bad juju'."

"That's not a logical cause."

"I know," sighed Mr Acme. "We have mountains of evidence on our side. All Mr Coyote has is his claim to genius. I suspect this case will be very short."

[AN: I don't count the title of the prompt thread as part of the prompt, but in this case, I made an obvious exception]

[Image (c) Can Stock Photo / lenm]

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