Challenge #01521-D060: Perspective Post Peril
(Couldn't make this entirely gender-neutral. I suspect the terms do not exist in English. Although I know half a dozen ways to say one of them in various fictional universes, one of them might be the correct English form of address. As for a gender-neutral term for the person in charge of a Duchy (apart from the major-domo or seneschal or whatever who's actually running it all... idk)
[Person #1]: (VERY full of themselves, has been nothing but irritating, has no training, and has barged into a situation where they could get everyone killed and demanded to be in charge, only to be offended when Person #2 refuses) I am (longwinded recitation of titles). (More titles). (MORE titles), who are you?
[Person #2] (has been working the whole time, is stressed) Who am I? I am [His/Her/Their) Grace, (Sir/Lady/?) [Name], (Duke/Duchess/?) of the People Who Don't Give A Rat's Arse, and Knight of the Order of Go-Fuck-Yourself. And of course, although it may be of no importance and I beg your pardon, the person with the relevant training toward keeping us all alive. -- RecklessPrudence
Space. There's quite a lot of it. As you might expect, the gulfs between points of interest are vast and there's no real need for official shipping lanes beyond the confidence to be found if, say, one's ship happens to suffer a catastrophic breakdown in the middle of nowhere. Such as what has happened to the Higher Class whilst it was so desperately off-course that there was no such thing as a course to take, any more.
Oh, and it also happens to be falling towards a Brown Dwarf, a star so small that it might double as a gas giant. The coldest class of star yet discovered. Of course, none of this matters should one's vessel actually fall inside, where the temperatures are still hot enough to burn one alive whilst also crushing one to death.
A fate that awaits the Higher Class, all its crew, and Ambassador Verille. Who happens to be the one to have ordered the "intense course correction" that got the ship into trouble in the first place. All because ze was in a hurry. And now the Ambassador was impatient about the repairs. Not because of the impending doom on the Higher Class, but because ze was now late in meeting hir friends on Hitizzy.
Ze bullied hir way through almost all official channels, all the way to engineering, where a N'Ozzie engineer and the ships' Nae'hyn priest were operating on the gravity propulsion drive[1]. The N'Ozzie was in an awkward knot with their toes gripping some hand-rails and most of their body in an open cavity.
"Ha, HA! I told you it was the spline actuator frigit. 'S always th' spline actuator frigit. No worries, darls. We're getting you a transplant right now."
"What is the meaning of this outrage," cliché'd the Ambassador.
The N'Ozzie and Nae'hyn simultaneously moved away from their work to shout, "You can't be in here! Get out!"
"I," announced Verille, "am Their Highest, Sanctified Purest, Laird Caln Ambassador Verille, Goddex of Tilaroux, Khalse of Rixxor, Heir to the Sanctum of Broxx and Ambassador of the Krok'kari people. Who are you to give me orders?"
The N'Ozzie made a fist and said, "Now listen, mate," as a prelude to a "good ole stouche[2]".
But the Nae'hyn stilled their arm and murmured, "Diplomacy."
The N'Ozzie took a deep breath whilst Verille tapped hir foot in impatience. "Who am I? I am Hir Grace, Laird Mandawuy, Dux of the People Who Don't Give A Rat's Arse, and Knight of the Order of Go-Fuck-Yourself.[3] And of course, although it may be of no importance and I beg your pardon, the person with the relevant training toward keeping us all alive. Now rack off and let me save everyone's arse including yours, though I dunno what you do with it, considering all the shit droppin' out of your mouth!"
The Nae'hyn slowly face-palmed during Madawuy's speech. "Please leave us to work in peace, Ambassador," they sighed. "The sooner we are finished, the sooner we can all be on our way."
Verille, flustered and sputtering, stammered out, "Well I should certainly hope so!" It was only later, after ze arrived at hir destination and hir peers explained things to hir, that Ambassador Verille later found Engineer Madawuy and profusely apologised. Ze was a sheltered cogniscent and had not a single idea of how much danger ze was in by the time the _Higher Class was finally underway.
[1] gravity drives, alternately 'grav' or 'gravy' drives are Nae'hyn constructions that only work when their engineer follows the Nae'hyn philosophy that machines gain life as they are used. As a result, gravity drives aren't repaired so much as 'operated' on, or 'healed'. They are not so much made as born.
[2] Stouche (n): [orig: Strine] To fight, brawl, or otherwise punch in an effective, but unfair manner.
[3] There you go. An entire brace of gender-neutral terms of address. Free of charge and used in context. Most care of this neat tumblr. Though 'Dux' I knew on my own.
[Image (c) Can Stock Photo / ezumeimages]
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