RE: The Writing on the Wall - Finish The Story: Week 46
This is just spectacular, the way you open so beautifully, and then the statues, the way you incorporate his ancestors is just brilliant, it builds this palpable horror tone, painting so wonderfully the weight of the Leitner Legancy Benjamin faces. Then the history you bring in with each of them is like flashes of vivid memory. It all combined in a strong sense of realism, that is just prime for the statue carving its foreboding message.
Then the spirits inhabiting him, playing so fantastically on the set up in the first half. And the moment of memory you chose then, with it's searing descriptions, just a beautiful teaser of the visceral action that follows.
The way you use Melinda, with her lover - a great touch, building suspense in her wavering confidence, until she is forced to find her way through the darkness. It leads so perfectly into your ending, (which I love!! <3) as dripping in horror as his blood soaked face. Just wonderfully done, so very glad you managed to bring us this one!
~ Calluna
Thank you @bananafish knight, Calluna. I must say this is the thing I've missed most on this hiatus from writing poetry and fiction on steem; the wonderful insightful comments that help me see the piece through another person's eyes.
I'm so glad you enjoyed the story ending. I wasn't sure if I'd gone overboard with the shock factor at the end but I was really happy with the atmosphere and pace when I gave it a brief edit. It's really cool to have your feedback which confirms my instincts. Glad to be back writing horror, it is one of my fav genres to write :)
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