Sexual Liberation vs the War on Objectification

in #feminism8 years ago (edited)

The empowerment of women has been disputed ever since the transition from second-wave to third-wave feminism.

Quick reminder

  • First-wave feminism focused on political empowerment
  • Second-wave feminism focused on economical empowerment
  • Third-wave feminism focuses on cultural empowerment

Cultural empowerment is the greatest challenge of all since culture is not something we can write into law. Culture is something none of us have power over individually. Even if we put all our heads together, culture is difficult to unlearn.

What has our culture taught us?

As children we develop an understanding of how our world works through our caregivers, our schools, our peers and the mass media.

  • Pink is for girls
  • The Hulk is for boys
  • Make up is for ladies
  • Muscles are for men
  • Etc etc


These are the kinds of things Third Wave feminism sought to question.
Another one of these cultural differences between men and women is our complicated relationship with SEX.

Feminism Contradicts Itself

Feminism is not just a movement in which you have to be on one side, nor is it a rulebook or a cult or even a set of beliefs. Feminism is way too complex for any of that.

Feminism is the radical notion that women are people

At its core feminism is simply the belief in equality between men and women

But what makes us more equal?

  • When women are afforded the same respect as men
    Or
  • When women have the freedom to express their sexuality

Lets talk Sex!

Culturally men and women are inclined to see sex differently.

  • There are books on how to “pick up chicks” but for women the equivalent is “how to catch him and keep him
  • Men will often say they lose respect for women who “give it up” on the first date but I’ve never heard of a man losing respect for himself or another man for partaking in the one night stand.
  • Women are much less likely to be praised by their peers for “scoring” and in fact are more likely to be scorned for their bad judgement.

So what if you decided FUCK YOU WORLD! I’mma be a slut!

Well from the point of view of the pop culture that brings you Iggy Azalea, Nicki Minaj and Beyonce by doing so you would be standing up for “feminism”.

And who am I to argue with them. I cannot redefine feminism to suit my personal views. If Beyonce wants to say “Bow Down Bitches” is a feminist song, then my perception of this cannot change her understanding of what it means to her to be feminist.

So let’s all go on a SLUT WALK

If you want to feel sexy and empowered by your sexuality then let’s walk with the women bare chested. But when you speak to the women who started these “slut walks” and tell them how you feel it is in your right to sleep around and flaunt your sexuality you might be surprised by the response you get.

I mean you do what you want but that is just not what the march is about.

What’s it about then?

Since 2011 women have been marching in protest against violence against women.

Specifically RAPE.

So how does getting our tits out help?

After a number of university students were repeatedly lectured by authorities on how to prevent themselves from getting raped, at least one of these students had had enough. Even in the world where women wear burkas, rape is thriving! The reason the women walk topless and call themselves “sluts” is to make the bold statement that even a slut does not deserve to be raped! In fact, many of the women don’t walk topless. Many of them wear the outfits they were wearing when they themselves were sexually assaulted. What you might be surprised to see is a lot of these women wearing pyjamas.

Objectification & Dehumanization

I read a post yesterday that suggested that women enjoy being objectified. What I believe the author meant is that women like to be admired for their beauty, and with that I cannot argue since it is human nature to enjoy admiration for any qualities worth admiring, be they aesthetic or personal. But to me, to say women enjoy objectification means that women enjoy seeing other women - as in the women represented by the media - chopped up into pieces of tits and ass for the world to visualise as mere decoration.

People often misinterpret the word objectification to mean that by admiring a woman’s body you must be visualising her as an object. In actual fact, it isn't in our nature to dehumanise a person we are sexually attracted to without the help of The Male Gaze which is a reconstruction of our view by the camera to force the viewer - man (which the camera assumes as the viewer) or woman - to see the women on screen as decoration through the eyes of the male protoganist.

So does sexuality have power?

Perhaps there is power in sexual confidence. Perhaps we can take an advantage by exuding our sexual prowess. But more likely, when a person of either sex resorts to selling their sexuality to gain attention or rewards, it is the buyer who is in power. Beyonce can sing “Girls run the World” all she likes, but when a dog rolls over to win the approval of his owner, it is the man who has power over the dog.

I do believe in sexual liberation. I believe in a womans right to feel sexually comfortable in herself, in her right to enjoy the company of multiple sexual partners without shame, and the right to feel liberated by their self-respect in seeking sexual pleasure and not allowing themselves to feel stigmatized by a world which still treats men as the rightful owners of sexual pleasure.

But it is not objectification that empowers you to feel liberated.
This has the opposite effect on women everywhere.

Conclusion

There is nothing wrong with a woman who values her own youth and beauty.

  • But there is something very wrong with a world that teaches us that the only value women will ever hold is in our beauty and our sexuality, both of which become redundant as we age.

There is nothing wrong with a man who views a woman in a movie like an object, when that movie has clearly drawn her to be objectified.

  • But there is something very wrong with a world that objectifies women so constantly that it becomes difficult for a man to view a woman in the real world as a respectable person just like him.

There is nothing wrong with a woman who sells her body for a living.

  • But there is something very wrong with a world that taught her and the people involved, that she was not worth investing time and work in the skills and education that may have given her a better life.
Sort:  

You mostly had me till this:

Perhaps there is power in sexual confidence. Perhaps we can take an advantage by exuding our sexual prowess. But more likely, when a person of either sex resorts to selling their sexuality to gain attention or rewards, it is the buyer who is in power. Beyonce can sing “Girls run the World” all she likes, but when a dog rolls over to win the approval of his owner, it is the man who has power over the dog.

Respectfully, this is just silly. Would you say the same thing about any other "God given" skill or talent?

"When a violin virtuoso plays for the masses, it's the masses that are in control" and the violinists is being exploited. Just...no.

"When Michael Jordan dunks a basketball from the free throw line, it's the fans that are in control" and MJ is being exploited. Nope.

Beauty, or sex appeal, is like any other innate skill or talent. Voluntarily monetizing that innate skill or talent in ways that YOU want and for YOUR own selfish reasons is NOT being exploited. Rather, it's making people pay for the privilegdge of witnesses or experiencing your talent/skill/attribute.

Why do you single out beauty or sex appeal as being lessor than any other talent that society values? It's not. To deprive yourself of the price that society is willing to pay hurts both you and society, but mainly you.

proofreading: lessor
;)

You've got me wrong here. Perhaps the thumbnail suggests it but I'm not saying we're being exploited. I am aware that a woman who has sex for money (just as example) is no more exploited than the mechanic covered in grease and oil. If sexuality was indeed a "powerful talent", then why is it women resort to this talent while men resort to others?

Personally I feel women are clutching for the only thing we can find power from when we resort to sexuality. If it truly were powerful, you would see just as much male sex appeal in the world as woman's.

Quite the contrary. Any book on evolutionary psychology will explain to you why women are desired (in part) for their sexuality while men are desired more (in part) for their brawn, etc.

In short, women are sexually pursued (rather than men) because evolution. Female eggs are scarce and precious (and thus to be pursued sexually) while male sperm is cheap and plentiful. The more rare thing is always there more valued/desired. A female competing for access to male sperm makes about as much sense as competing for air.

There are a few species of animals (birds, frogs, etc.) where the roles are reversed--where the female's eggs are cheap and plentiful and the male sperm less so. In those species, the females invariably pursue the males for sex rather than vice versa.

Men are actually pursued by women, just for different reasons (brawn, resources, etc.).

To diminish a women's ability to market her most evolutionarily valuable asset would be like denying men the ability to market their's--their brawn. What if we were taught to believe that selling our labor (brawn) was shameful while selling our sex appeal was commendable? Silly, right? But only as silly as the reverse.

Women don't have to "earn" their way in the world as much as men do. They already have what most every man wants. So...who is zooming whom here? Females only lose when they are shamed into giving away their most valueable asset rather than selling it like everyone else does.

And actually, they do sell it. They just sell it secretly, and in ways the men find acceptable because they can manage and control it better.

See I don't buy that "because evolution" at all. What I buy is history. If what you say is true that it is women and not men who are more sexually appealing, then why in Pompeii were women paying to have sex with male prostitutes in the brothels? I recommend a visit to "the secret collection" in the history museum in Naples if you'd like to open your mind to a very different perspective on sexuality.

you don't see anything but what you want to, and when someone asks you to explane something you mute them and run off after flagging all their posts. your a cunt

And some women can dunk a basketball too. But VERY few.

But on average, and in every culture and at every time in history, men have pursued females for sex far more than the reverse. Of COURSE there are instances of the reverse, but the averages are far apart on this one. There are actual statistics on this. Well known ones. And it's not even close.

I have to disagree with you here. Women definetly have to "earn" there way if they want to achieve success , probably much more so than men because they have this sexual barrier they must get past.

your a stupid cunt. go virtue seek on tumbler cunt

Really good article! @beanz, we really need more feminism here to combat the icky MRA rhetoric being vomited everywhere

Thanks to @kyriacos for the new custom follow button!

Get yours here!

follow the cunt that will flag you if you say something she doesn't like button

why do you keep proving them wrong by flagging? can you not defend yourself from someone saying tour talking crap? oh yeah your a cunt for flaging people you disagree with and the reason steemit is going to die

We're just a stew of paradoxes and contradictions. This was well written, the message should be easy enough but it seems like we're still so far from accepting each other as equal humans.

I think as individuals many of us see the issues, but it is mainly the various industries (beauty, diet etc) who profit from our insecurities and seep into our sense of reality without our full consciousness of it happening.

That's what I hope rinses out of the collective psyche sooner rather than later.

I liked how you mentioned what the "Slut Walk" is about.

Isn't it bizarre how women's nipples are more controversial than wearing bras that highly enlarge and exaggerate cleavage!

It is bizarre lol. This world if extremely bizarre. We are a mess of contradictions lol.

your a cunt, you cant support anything you say with data. and when someone points out your full of shit you flag them and mute them. cunt!

AGREE! The best post I have read in a long time. I was waiting for this so thank you so much for sharing @beanz.

why not prove people wrong that disagree with you ensted of flagging them and muting them?

i'll re-read tomorrow but i think you are on point.

I loved your 'To Don't' list. ;)

do you love how you flag people you disagree with? cunt!

Great post for sure. I don't normally read this type of content but i thought whynot for a change it is @beanz lol....nice one:)

Cool do I have a fan in you ;) lol

your a super cunt. why not prove him wrong ensted of flagging and muting when points have been brought up showing your full of shit?

Coin Marketplace

STEEM 0.20
TRX 0.13
JST 0.029
BTC 66217.53
ETH 3316.11
USDT 1.00
SBD 2.70