It's happening
Hey everyone. This won't be very long, but I just wanted to tell you all what is happening to me and my family. I decided to homeschool my kids a few weeks ago. I did everything legally. Yes my husband is going through some issues with depression and is out of work, but we have our tax return to live on and the bills are paid through May.
I stupidly confided in my mom about a concern I have. She's the only one I told. This was a few months ago. My mom freaked out and overreacted as usual, and called my mother in law saying she didn't know what to do, and would maybe call "the authorities." She has called them on me for ridiculous reasons before like having a messy house. Reasons even too dumb for a social worker to investigate because they've always ignored her. I've been distant with her since then but she calls and tries to get together. She doesn't know I know about her conversation with my mother in law. Over the phone I told her I was homeschooling now though. She's the only one I told so far.
She wanted to take us all to McDonald's and I declined. She wanted us all over for cake and ice cream for her birthday and I declined. She wanted the kids over last weekend but because of the snowstorm I declined. She's prone to wild speculation.
Then today they came.
A social worker and the school liaison officer...
I was at the grocery store. My husband answered. They brought up the concern (just want my privacy with this issue, but it in no way endangers the health, safety, or well being of our children) and said they wanted to make sure everything was ok since the kids were out of school. My husband didn't know what to do and said he would rather have them come back when I was home so we could be together.
They are coming back tomorrow at 3pm.
I am terrified.
I am furious!
I have been crying on and off all day.
I don't know what to do!
I don't know what will happen!
We are good parents! We are just going through tough times that would have worked themselves out without any kind of intervention as always!!
Please pray for our family! Any advice would be greatly appreciated! Never have my children been taken from me in my dealings with these people before but I'm still scared! I really don't know what is going to happen. They've been out of my life for almost a year and they're back again.
HELP!
@canadian-coconut @familyprotection
I vow to never talk to my mother again!!! 😡
Thanks for reading
Love, snowpea ❤
Do NOT let them in your home without a Court Order.
Do NOT let them speak with your children without a Court Order.
Use your own words very sparingly. Remember that whatever you say can and WILL be used against you. You are guilty until proven innocent in the CPS system.
Ask them to outline their concerns in a letter or email, and that you will answer them by letter or email. This way everything is documented and they have to get to the point and can't use as much trickery as it is all recorded.
I am so so sorry that this is happening to you.
You need more time to think and prepare, so don't let them rush you into anything. Do not admit to them that there are any problems or that you need any help.
I think that I would try to leave the children at a friend's home during the time that they plan on coming, just in case.
Please keep us informed. You can also contact me privately on Discord.
I want to take your advice but I'm in disagreement with my husband. He thinks we should let them in. I will contact you on discord. This is such a mess. I'm going to have him read these comments too. :(
GOD NO!!!! Your husband is WRONG!!! You need me to talk to him? I will PM you my number. We had to back the bastards down when we had twin grandkids.
if you let them in they will find ANY reason to say you are "___" and take your children. Please do not ever let them in. And only answer their questions if you must but nothing more. Do not give them any more information than you have to. Anything you say WILL be used against you.
I understand in our case I thought it would be best to let them in ,and my boyfriend said NO.. but we let them in.. I didnt know all these things that I know now.. did you have the visit yet?
I would REFUSE to allow them inside your home. Unless they have a legal paper or warrant you are under no obligation to allow them inside. Talk to them outside or at a coffee shop. Secondly, have a witness or two there. Third perhaps your witness could record, journal or document this. They do not want to be recorded so that may scare them. Fourth keep your kids as far away as possible from them.
I did a blog about ideas for this recommending an offense rather than a defense. There are paragraphs in it that will be resourceful. Here is the link https://steemit.com/familyprotection/@enjoywithtroy/are-you-playing-offense-or-defense-the-cps-foster-care-game-enjoy-with-troy
I will pray for you. What ever do not let them have your kids. Even a human shield protecting them is good. Blessings my friend. @snowpea
Oh no! How can a family member do this to you?
If only she knew the devastation that is so often caused once cps get involved.
My advice would be in line with @canadian-coconut and @enjoywithtroy.
Don't let them in.
Only communicate with them on paper if possible.
Record everything.
All families go through hardship at some point in their lives but it can always be worked out, unless cps get involved. They prey on the weak and vulnerable so you need to be the opposite, be strong and confident that you are a great mother and you will protect your children from any attempted kidnapping from the state.
We are here for you, you are not alone.
I would start by being honest with your mother and let her know that you do not trust her. Tell her that she is no longer welcome in your home because she is putting her grandchildren in danger. Than cut ties with her for a few months. I know this sounds harsh and evil of me to say but right now she IS putting YOUR children in danger.
Than make sure you have all of the legal paperwork you need to show CPS that your children are within the law homeschooling. There is no need to speak of anything more about your right to home school. Sometimes the school officer just needs to be informed that you are legal. Paperwork gets crossed some times.
Do not let them in. PERIOD. They will try EVERYTHING to get in. They will tell you "I need to see your cupboards" "I need to see where the children sleep". ANYTHING. Respond with, Most currently as soon as you get a court order.
And most important thing ever. DO NOT show that you are upset. Any outburst shown by you will only give them more reason. Sing a song in your head, count to 100, do whatever it takes to stay calm.
Work on how your posture is and make sure you are not standing with your hands crossed. Practice in the mirror if you must. Be overnice, but not accommodating. And breath, once they leave you can break down and cry if you must but do not get on the phone and call anyone, or post on social media that you are upset.
Stay strong and you will get through this.
Oh, honey. DO NOT LET THEM IN THE DOOR WITHOUT A WARRANT.
Too many people think "Well, if I cooperate this will all go away faster."
WRONG!!!!
They have declared war on you, you need to go into this like a warrior. NO FEAR. Harness your ANGER. Do not let THEM see your anger, just channel that energy into your "momma bear" zone and defend your family.
Step OUTSIDE and have your husband lock the door behind you, and he stays with the kids. You walk them OFF YOUR PROPERTY and then you stay ON your property. All very polite... "Hey, you are trespassing so lets go over here and we can chat while you are on public property, not my land, OK?" All smiles.
Know the exact code for your state. "Oh, I did not invite you on my land, so you are in violation of Idaho Code Title 18 Chapter 70 Section 18-7008, please do not make me call the police over this."
SMILE. Let your kids wave at them through the window - ALL SMILES. Do NOT let your kids be afraid, if they see the kids upset...
Geez honey, prayers for you and your family.
my heart goes out to you. You got some terrific advice here from many people. Just be strong and don't be intimidated, and do not let them in or coerced into letting them in.
Say the utmost minimum with as few words and little detail as possible. Any word can be ammunition for them, so just keep things Very simple in any communications..
Always demand to see a warrant if they want to come in. Otherwise you can inform them that it is:
The constitutional right for parents and children to live together, guaranteed by the 4th 14th and 1st amendment to the US constitution?
It is also constitutionally improper to remove a child unless there is reasonable and articulable evidence to support the proposition that the child is in immediate danger of bodily danger or death at the hands of the parents.
Sending love
<3
Keep us informed, @snowpea. Stay strong. You haven't done anything wrong so don't let the parasites make you start feeling guilty, or give in to fear.
Oh no @snowpea so sad to read this.. I wish you would be spared from this. I would be furious at my mom .. I think @canadian-coconut an @markwhittam gave the best tips.. I don't know if they will accept you refusing to let them in, because I was so stupid to let them in myself in the past..
Take a deep breath, you are strong (I remember that stalking part you also went through) and you are smart. Don't let them see how they got you all worked up, show them your strenght ..
Please keep us updated .. Good luck!
Have your husband read a lot these stories and the comments here, then see if he still feels the same way. My prayers are with you and your beautiful family!!! If they have your phone ready to record everything if they show up, that at when they break the law, you can sue them. You might also want to have an attorney there with you when they come. Or at least tell them your atty advised you not to let them in.. if they know you are prepared to sue them personally, they may just turn tail and run.
This post was upvoted and resteemed by #thethreehugs. Thank you for you your contributions and support of our community here @familyprotection.
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