Siblings Bonding Equally Important – 孩子之间的交情也一样的重要

Having two daughters is one of the greatest joys of my life. We always talked about bonding between parents and children. Yes, parent-child bonding is important, not to forget that bonding between siblings is as important as well.

有了两个千金带给我很多的欢乐。我们时常说保持父母与孩子良好的关系很重要，但我们不要忘记，孩子之间的交情也一样的重要。

The sibling relationship is the most enduring relationship in our life. There are tons of benefits of having a healthy sibling relationship. For example, during Chinese New Year, when we visit the ‘not-so-close' relatives the situation can be awkward. With siblings around, things are getting easier. Siblings understand each other very much, they will become great travel companion as well. Whenever we have trouble, siblings are usually the first who lends out the helping hand.

兄弟姐妹情是我们一生中最长久的感情。拥有良好的兄弟姐妹情会带来很多的好处。比如，春节期间当一些比较疏的亲戚拜访时，情况一般都会比较尴尬。有了兄弟姐妹的陪伴，一切就容易多了。兄弟姐妹也是很好的旅行伴侣，因为大家都彼此了解对方，知道谁对什么会比较有兴趣，安排行程也方便多了。如果遇上什么困难，家里的兄弟姐妹会第一时间伸出援手。

The above are just some of many reasons for having good sibling relationships. To build healthy sibling relationships, it has to start when they were young, very young. Yes, parents are responsible for setting it right in the first place.

Here are some tips I would like to share on building healthy sibling relationships.

以上只是其中一些良好的兄弟姐妹感情的好处。要打好兄弟姐妹感情的基础就要从父母开始。
接下来我想在这里分享如何让孩子们有良好的感情。

Be Consistent

When kids did something great, we need to give them compliments to encourage them. However, parents need to be consistent and make sure all siblings are giving the same compliment when they did great jobs. Similar to punishment, it needs to be consistent for similar offence as well. Even the time we spent on each sibling needs to be equally distributed as well. Biased or favoured to any sibling is one key thing that we never want them to think of us.

一致的对待
当小孩做了一些值得鼓励的事，我们必须称赞他们。我们一定要用同样的方式对待孩子们。当其他孩子做了类似的事，也应该得到称赞。同样的，如果两个孩子犯了类似的错误，也应该得到类似的惩罚。我们给予孩子们的时间也应该平均的分配，每个孩子也要得到同样的关注。千万别让孩子们觉得我们对其中的孩子有偏见。

Don't Compare

Comparing between siblings is a big NO NO. For example, by telling one of them that they are not as smart as their siblings. The impact will be so great that could break the bonding between the parent and child, as well as between siblings. Don't think that they never remember when they have grown up. Many times, we did it once and they will remember forever, especially things that hurt or disappointed them so deeply.

别做比较
切记，千万别拿兄弟姐妹来做比较，尤其在他们面前。比如，跟其中一个孩子说他不比弟弟聪明。这样的比较对孩子们的伤害是很大的。不止会影响兄弟姐妹之间的感情，也会影响父母跟孩子的感情。别认为孩子们会容易善忘，他们的记忆比成年人强多了，尤其是伤害到他们心灵的事件，永远都记得的。

Encourage Togetherness

Encourage siblings to participate in activities and outings. For examples, together build a big house from bricks, doing some gardening together, car washing could be fun too. Important is to let them cherish each and every moment they are together. Additionally, build the bonding by accomplished the tasks together. Once they get used to being a companion to each other, it will become a natural thing to do.

鼓励团结
鼓励孩子们多一起参与活动。比如，一起用积木塔一栋大房子，一起打扫花园，或一起洗车也可以。重要是让孩子们爱惜彼此的存在。不止如此，一起参与活动也可以增加兄弟姐妹之间的感情。当他们习惯了有对方的存在，感情就会变得自然了。

Find common interest

It's normal that each kid will be having their own interest. Parents have to observed and find their common interest and encouraged them to do that activity together more often. For example, my two princesses like to dance together while watching YouTube. So, very often we join their dance party together. The house will be filled with the sound of laughter.

找出相同的兴趣
孩子们有不同的兴趣是很普通的事。我们必须观察他们并找出一些他们共同的兴趣，然后多鼓励他们一起做那件事。我的两位公主喜欢看着YouTube跳舞，我跟太太也常跟他们一起傻跳一番。屋里都充满了笑声，多温馨呀。

Time off

We tent to appreciate a thing only after we have lost it. Likewise, this will happen to kids as well. Spending too much time together might not be a good thing. It will be good if there are times where they can do their own things, play with their own friends. When they reconnect, they will appreciate each other companion even more.

给予适当的空间
很多人次次要等到失去了才后悔没珍惜。小孩也是一样的。当他们每时每刻有在一起，就会觉得有对方的陪伴是理所当然的。一时，给他们各自一些空间，做一些他们各自爱做的事。当他们再次一起玩时，你会感觉到他们很开心看见对方，这样他们都会比较珍惜有对方存在的时间。

Whenever they did something that cares for each other, those moments #MakeMeSmile. I know they are walking towards the right direction. I am very pleased with their progress. Hope they will keep the sibling relationship to the end.

每当我看见他们做出一些照顾对方的动作时，我脸上会自然的微笑起来，也知道他们姐妹情很不错。希望他们会一直这样发展他们的感情。

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