About the budget, housing and property

Hello, yesterday I promised to tell you why I always wanted to live alone and I always did not understand the concept of "family budget". I was busy preparation for relocation and because of these fees, I forgot my promise, but my old school friend (a girl of my age), with whom we arranged a small modest farewell in the cafe, reminded me of this today.
In general, the situation with the friend is this: a year ago she married his peer, a guy in general is a good: not a drug addict, not an alcoholic, not an abuser, but he is very irresponsible. This lack of responsibility is expressed in the fact that he lives as if this day is the last in life, never calculating the possible consequences of his actions. Well, for example, he can refuse go to work in the morning because he spent the whole night playing games on the computer and he want to sleep, it's all the same to him that the day after tomorrow he will be fired for absenteeism. Well, or being unemployed, he can get a loan from a bank with bad conditions because here and now, the new smartphone wanted, having no idea how to return this loan. Naturally, with this approach to life, he never has money and he always owes everything.
But girl, on the contrary, very responsible and hardworking, works in my former office in accounting, everyone respects and loves this girl at work, and in the evenings when the influx of visitors, she works in a local cafe as a waitress.

Well, there is always such a situation: she opens a locker, but where there used to be a pile of money in a centimeter in height, there are only a couple of small bills. The boy once again got stuck in some ass and took the money to pay off this ass - for example, the police caught him when he was drunk driving a car, and now he needs to pay a bribe to return his driver's license, or he can provoke a fight with the son of a local police chief, and then he will have to pay twenty times the damage (torn shirt), so that the victim did not complain to his father.

But when the girl begins to express her dissatisfaction with the fact that he takes her money to solve his personal problems, he answers: "I did not take this money from you, I took it from the family budget, we are a family, we have everything in common."

Is this how to "common"? If she only bring, and he only spend money. Well, or there are situations on the contrary.

The same issue with joint large purchases. Here's a husband and wife bought something expensive together for two, how will they then share it? How will decisions be taken on the use of this property? Well, if you buy an apartment for example - Whose is this property? A thing is always someone's. If it's yours, you can dispose of it as you like and no one will disturb you. You will be able to smoke indoors, invite any guests whom you want and at any time when you want itd.

From the very childhood, it seemed to me that if someone lives together (two or more people in one house/apartment), then this is only because there is that one of them (or both at once) simply has nowhere to live. Well, it's true. The dream of every normal person is to have your own housing and a car (also your own). This is especially important for residents of my country, where the monthly rent for the most simple housing is usually higher than the average monthly salary of a working person.

And for some reason this whole family life seemed to me like this: that second man is terribly suffering, because he does not have his own house, and the first, taking advantage of the privilege of possession and the right to dispose of, terribly scoffs.
Well, or the second option - when they, having equal rights to own, with scandals, trying to combine the incompatible (pedantic/careless, miser/spender, clean fanat/disorder fanat, etc.), and they live together each of them gradually accumulates money to buy their own homes, and someday, they buy each of their homes, then happily, with champagne and fireworks are moving to their own homes.

Because even if is a common (50/50) house, then who in it then command? Who has the right to say "I'm bored with you, I do not want to see you anymore, you have 10 minutes for collect your belongings and get out"?

As for joint rest, for me, too, it was all clear - when everyone pays for himself and does what he wants, - you can go together in order to communicate with a person with whom you want to communicate.
But if someone is traveling at the expense of someone, then as a rule, he should do what he says (who pays), you only go to those excursions that he will finance, there is only that food that he will allow, etc. And this is already not rest, but some kind of penal servitude and torture.
Probably, I have a very strange way of thinking, but still it is, and all my life I was such an individualist.