Let go the story of the day, the teacher says at the start of our vinyasa class. Let go everything that has happened, and come into the present moment.

Five years ago I felt like punching teachers for saying such platitudes.

What on earth were they talking about? Did they even know, or were they just spouting crap from their instagram feeds? You see, I'm a yoga cynic - there's so many teachers out there that have been practicing yoga for 5 minutes, do 200 hours of training, and believe they are an authority on life advice, or do a damn good job of faking it until they make it. Especially if they look good in lululemons. So darling, don't tell me to let go unless you can really teach me what that means.

Here I am revealing a not so nice side of me on the Steem blockchain. But I'm going to let go of that fear that you'll judge me for it and create a story of me, because that's your story, and not mine. I have many, many shifting stories of who I am - I don't even really know who I really am from day to day, moment to moment. Unhappiness comes when we think we know who we are, and something happens that challenges this fixed 'self'.

We all have these stories, and I have read a few heartfelt and beautiful revelations of what people have had to let go of in order to find peace as I've read people's responses to the @ecotrain question this week: 'What is the value of letting go? What have you let go of recently and how has it changed your life?'. These stories are familiar to us because we've all had to go through them in some way, because we're human. We worry about what people think of us, we have our worlds upheaved by death and loss and failed relationships. We fight with siblings, become estranged from family, break down from stress, move countries, fail at the dreams we've been clinging on to our whole lives. In the words of R.E.M, everybody hurts.

Whilst the yoga teacher that infuriated me might have been expressing it in a way that implied a mere platitude, the advice behind the words is absolutely yogic. Modern yoga has shaved centuries of philosophical practice into two words - let go. Jivamukti Yoga, founded by Shannon Gannon and David Life in New York in the 1980's, uses as it's central mantra the words 'let go'. Breath in (let), breathe out (go).

Patanjali, the yogic sage, wrote in his Yoga Sutras about abhyasa and vairyga, which basically mean 'never give up' and 'let go of attachments' - they work in tandem, always. Through meditative, contemplative practice and continuous self study, we become more aware of what to let go of, and how to do that. Abhyasa (often translated as sadhana, or more specific practice, such as breathwork) means having a life that is attentive of what we do, speak and think that lead us in the 'right' direction, a more positive life (including spiritual practices). Vairyga is the gradual letting go of all the thoughts that might distract us from a more positive and spiritual life.

This practice of life that we're all bound up in needs us to become better at figuring out what actions, speech and thoughts lead us to a more positive, healthier and happier life (both for us and those around us). We often learn the hard way about our attachments and the thoughts that distract us from achieving balance, peace and contentment in our lives.

We need to constantly ask two questions:

• What brings me more calm and peace?

• What brings me less calm and peace?

By doing so, we can start to focus more on the 'more' and less on the 'less'. We move 'away' from the negative habits and the things we know are not good for us, creating new patterns and habits instead whilst the others fade away. It's about shifting our energy from one thing to another, in a conscious, determined way, even if it's difficult and painful. By doing so, we create space for the new and better.

It's a constant focus on attention, whilst being kind to ourselves when we don't always get it right. Life is constant story making, labelling, discriminating - a constant moving between holding on and letting go. Some stories serve us, some don't. The practice is getting better at figuring out the difference.

What the yoga teachers are trying to say when they say 'let go' is to get us to consider the stories that we allow to define us, and let those go. They ask us to step into the here and now and assess what we are in this moment, and to breathe into that space of possibility and hope. We don't have to become anything, to be anything - we just need to 'be', and in that space of being, we can be content.

What have you let go of recently and how has it changed your life?

The second part of this question is more deeply personal. I feel that this practice of breathing and letting go helps me constantly assess what I'm holding onto, what limits me and what frees me. Every time I roll out my mat, or check into my breath in the car, I'm assessing what thoughts I'm having and what stories I'm telling myself. I'm in constant flux and flow - the river flows, after all, and is never the same river, moment to moment.

I do think it's hard to entirely let things go. Experiences can go deep, and enter into our very bones and tissues. Trauma psychology will tell you this.

However, I guess I can say that I'm learning to let go of the story that my father will always be central to my life. It's been a tough year, feeling grief and deep anguish that he might die. I felt this grief in every cell of my body, and in most of my meditations and daily practices, my thoughts have travelled there, and to how I will be in the world without him. Constant practice has helped me let go this anxiety, knowing that despite what happens, he will always be in my heart, and that death is an inevitable part of life that actually gives us more joy, not less. Without darkness, light is not quite as beautiful.

I always knew this, of course - life is about peeling away the onions layers that cover what we already know - but I had to live these sensations fully, and with awareness, and breath - and let go. This has helped me to be more grateful for what I do have, and how it is my responsibility as a human being to live this life in full joy and love, no matter what is thrown at me. Loss is natural, like any loss - the death of others, the death of the self, the death of our thoughts and beliefs and identities as we come into more fruitful and peaceful ways of being. We need to be okay with it all, and not resist and avoid it when life is tough, or attach and cling to joy when it's good.

So when the yoga teacher says, let go the stories of your day, I resist feeling irritated, and drop in to what I know to do - to breath, and let go.