Thanks for your considered response - much appreciated. I have a lot of experience of cannabis, but it's not really open to me because of my family situation. I'm not sure whether medical-grade CBD is available in the UK; I could look into that for sure.

The doc has referred me to a therapist of sorts. I suspect it'll be all about CBT and mindfulness practice rather talking it out, if that were even possible.

I'm good with the alcohol for now - it's been 13 years, though I know it pays not to be complacent. The meetings help with that, and many other things too.

Weight-gain is also an issue for me. I'm diabetic (type 2) and instead of picking up drugs or alcohol, I turn to sugar as my go-to destructive behaviour. So although I don't crave alcohol, I still indulge in self-destructive behaviour and I do still crave the comfort of oblivion, which really just means sleeping a lot.

Part of my decision to try the meds again is because of our family situation with debt and stress; I can't be there for my wife if I'm in a hole and she feels bad that she can't help me either. So a little medical help just to get my head above the water again and I can start feeling my connection again.

Thank you for your kind thoughts.