Dealing With Death...
I'll keep the post here short because it really is all in the video but recently someone close to me passed away. This is a video I recorded the day after because I truly believe there is a lot of value in people sharing themselves and their experiences in the rawest form. I believe it helps others who are going through the same thing, I think it helps people feel comfort, I believe it helps people process who haven't learned to process and it shows people that it's ok to cry and to show emotion.
I wanted to post this video for anyone who is in the process of losing someone or who has lost someone already. The words in this video are from my heart and are meant to explain my situation as well as offer a look into my thought process on it all. I hope this helps you as much as it has helped me and those who've seen it on YouTube this morning so far.
Thank you for your support, kindness and stories my friends.
▶️ DTube
▶️ IPFS
Hey Brian, this is a really touching video and topic. I am sorry your grandma was suffering for the last while. That's so tough. But, i agree with you, it was a huge blessing you had time to be with her in that last month. To make special memories and to say thank-you and good-bye to her. I really admire your bravery and realness in sharing. This is a blessing for me, and i will take a bit of time to share my current state in hopes too of offering myself opportunity to process and to let go of my grieving. Which i have been praying for an opportunity to do and kinda feel like this is it.
Yesterday was the anniversary of my dad's death. It's been 16 years since his untimely passing. Oddly enough, his name was Brian. He was 54. He died tragically in a car accident. I was away traveling on my own in Costa Rica at the time. A piece of my soul is still there actually. It was the most tragic time in my life. Being torn away from freedom in paradise to return to bitter cold and completely foreign territory to face my dad's death. (Literally it was the coldest winter in Saskatchewan history that March) I had just received a severance package from a great job and was in my early 20's. Was dating a man 12 years my senior. I returned to the airport, he was there to pick me up. My instincts screamed 'keep walking' to leave this man. I was in such turmoil, and consumed by my mind and emotions. Really, unprepared to process the grief and unknown territory ahead of me that i did not heed that inner wisdom. I was pregnant within days.
And, lived a life of turmoil and a fuck load of struggle for the next 15.5 years. Until, last summer. I was given a new lease on life. A second chance. My prayers were answered. I was rear ended in a high speed collision in the middle of the summer. Multiple breaks to my spine and other bones. Traumatic brain injury -- a world of hurt. Being completely dependent for many months. The man, now my husband, and father of our two children could not handle my needines in such a compromised state. It was very traumatic again, and, i had to leave him. Again, an answer to my prayers. Due to the abusiveness of the relationship, i do not know how else i would have left. I wouldn't have.
Fast forward 8 months to now. Through my dedication to my health, and yoga over those 15.5 years, i'd built a foundation that was supple, strong and capable. Miraculously, i will be able to heal and to transform my life from all that. Granted, there's lots to heal! But, it's remarkable the progress with the right environment & community.
My dad taught me to 'be myself' to do what i want. Not what everyone else thought/ expected me to do. Sadly, social pressures in childhood took me far from myself and, i had to wade through the brainwashing of being material and debt minded. But, at least i have done that work! And, am free of it now.
I wonder, just wonder, if more people just were allowed to show emotion, as you have here, and share in these critical moments --how much more peaceful life could be?
Thank-you for creating and holding space. I really believe overall, life is beautiful and good. And, that is my message and the reason why i did not exit this life last summer. To live! And, to share these teachings.
Blessings & Gratitude,
Your Grandma, my Dad -- they are so proud of us.
Love, Jill. 🐇🐶🐱💙💚💜
I wholeheartedly appreciate you taking the time to write this reply up and share your story with me and others. It really is cathartic and helpful to read from other people's experiences. Thank you so much <3
You're welcome it's really nice to connect in this way. It sure is healing. Blessings Brian 🙏
Sorry for your loss Brian.
I'm been through it a number of times.
Thank-you for resteeming this @aggroed. 🙏 as i shared in my comment, i really appreciate the opportunity to connect on this topic. Blessings, Jill
Thank you aggroed, I appreciate it. I'm sure it never gets easier but time allows processing
Losing is a sure thing, because someday we will also go, and when the time comes for us, make sure we are not left with remorse. Be patient sir..
Wise words 💜💚💙🙏
We will all go one day. Whosoever have problem with that should ask himself where is great great grandfather is right now!
But one thing as you said @kenoe is this, we should live in such a way that when we live without a feeling of unfulfillment.
We all still have enough time left to carve our names on the rock of time and bless humanity
Truth, we all will pass. It's important not to let laziness allow people and moments to sweep by you, but instead to do everything deliberately
I'm sorry for your loss, i hope the healing isn't lengthy. its always hardest for those left behind :o
Thank you so much my friend
Sorry to hear that Brian. We had one of our own here @adept pass away and while I didn't know him , I heard his voice everyday in steemspeak and it was odd to hear he was gone just like that.
Are you talking about the same @adept who is trying to launch adept coin. Are you serious about this?
Yes, I'm serious. You can read about his passing here.
I didn't know adept and was still very new when it happened but that was a really sad thing to see happen to the community. Especially to someone with a lot of drive and potential in his life...rest in peace
Hey man, new to your channel but wanted to send my condolences. I stopped and said a prayer when I noticed your headline.
Thank you for being open about how you are managing these changes as you are learning how to feel into the spaces that leave us so vulnerable.
May you and your loved ones be blessed, @brianturner.
(And if there is anything I can personally do to be a friend, please hit me up. I'm on discord. 💘)
Thank you so much my friend, I really truly appreciate your willingness to lend a helping hand or ear
Sorry for your lost Sir @brianturner. May God’s comfort be upon you and the family.
Sorry for your loss man. My prayers and thoughts are with you and your family as you endure this sad time. Be strong Brian..
Take heart dear because death is real and inavitable. All we need think about now is ourselves and to make sure we get fulfilled in life and to end well.
sorry for the loss man
thank you man <3