Dating East Asian Beauties: The Price Of Yellow Fever 约会东亚美女

Often known as "Yellow Fever" (黄热病) to typical Westerners, the allure of the typical Oriental woman seems as addictive as any potent drugs. Not surprisingly though there is a price to pay for every relationship and there is no such thing as a free ride.

“黄热病”通常被指为典型的西方人，典型的东方女人的魅力似乎跟任何强力药物一样令人上瘾。但毫无疑问，每段关系都需要付出，也没有免费搭乘的便车。

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Youku link (for Chinese audience):
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Talk to most males expats in Asia and you will find many a man who have been burnt by Yellow Fever, recover and then come back for more. The obvious attraction of Oriental women are their attributes; slim-petite build, demure, slim and know how to make a man feel like a king.

和大多数亚洲男性移民交谈，你会发现很多被黄热病灼伤的男人，恢复过来后，会再回过头来找。东方女性最吸引人的地方是她们的特质：身材娇小、端庄、苗条，懂得如何让男人感觉自己像个王。

However, most foreign men do not read these ladies correctly, due to cultural differences. Though every person does have their own unique character, let us examine some commonalities of East Asian women:

1. They are generally friendly and receptive to foreign men especially because it is a novelty to find a man who thinks and acts differently from the billion other East Asian men. Being friendly though is not equal to an automatic commitment.
   A man may be lucky enough to score a number, kiss, or one night stand but that is far from a done deal if one is considering a committed relationship.

2. The are generally more family oriented than women of many other cultures.
   e.g. In Western nations, leaving the family as quickly as possible is seen as a common fact. In East Asian, it is more common for women to stay on with their families, often until they are married.
   Whether or not a man gets a committed relationship / marriage with an East Asian women can often mean getting the approval from her family.

3. The society will constantly remind them of their biological clock that is constantly ticking.
   It is not uncommon for friends and even casual acquaintances to ask her if she's married and how many children she has.
   In China, women who are not married well into their 30s are known as "left over women".
   Because of such societal pressures, it is not uncommon for an East Asian women to think of marriage potential very early on in a relationship.

4. Thanks to globalization, the Asian culture is rapidly changing but yet East Asian culture has a strong grip.
   It is not uncommon for immigrants from East Asia to live in the West for years yet hold to their culture for decades if not generations.
   So even if your American born Japanese girl speaks perfect English with a local accent, she might well be very Japanese at heart.

5. When it comes to long term decisions, they are quite pragmatic and less dreamy.
   A East Asian women will think of matters such as financial and geographical practicalities of having a family with any man she considers for long term commitment and will constantly measure you up to her ideals.
   This is not to say that they are all as materialistic as in the above music video. However, this is not uncommon either.
   Men just have to work harder in Asia to figure out which is which.

然而由于文化差异，大多数外国男性不能正确解读这些女性。虽然每个人都有自己独特的性格，让我们来看看东亚妇女的一些共性：

1. 她们通常友好和善于接纳外国男性，特别是当她新奇的发现他的想法和行为异于其他十亿东亚男性。友好并不等于一种自动的承诺。一个男人可能足够幸运，能得到一个电话号码，香吻，或一夜情，但如果她正在考虑给这段关系加个承诺的话，那还离得远咧。

2. 与许多其他文化背景的妇女相比，东亚妇女更倾向于家庭。
   例如：在西方国家，尽快离开家庭被视为一个共同的事实。在东亚，妇女与家人生活在一起的情况更为普遍，往往直到她们结婚为止。
   无论这个男人是否得到这个亚洲女人男女朋友或是婚姻的承诺，通常都意味着将会得到她的家人的认可。

3. 社会不断提醒她们，她们的生物钟在不停地滴答作响。朋友甚至是普通的熟人都会问她是否结婚了，有多少个孩子。在中国，30多岁还没有结婚的女性被称为“剩女”。由于这种社会压力，很多东亚妇女很早就开始相亲。

4. 由于全球化，亚洲文化正在迅速变化，但东亚文化有着强烈的控制力。
   对西方国家的亚洲移民来说，很多人几十年来一直守着他们的文化。所以即使你是美国出生的日本女孩说一口流利的当地口音的英语，她内心可能是非常日本化的。

5. 当要做一个长期的决定时，她们是相当务实接地气的。一位东亚女性会考虑，譬如经济上和地理上的实用性，并且会不断地衡量你是否符合她的理想。并不是说她们如上述视频里所说都很物质。然而，这种情况也并不少见。在亚洲，男人们需更加努力地工作，才能弄清楚哪个是哪个。

In short, when dating in East Asia, what you see is certainly not what you get. As if understanding women itself is not challenging enough for men. Perhaps the largest price of dating Oriental women is the time and effort of learning and adapting to this foreign dating culture.

Bon courage! (Good luck!)

简而言之，在东亚约会，你看到的肯定不是你得到的。理解女人本身对男人来说并不是最大挑战。也许约会东方女性最大的代价是你付出时间和精力去学习和适应这种外国的约会文化。

加油！(祝你好运！)