One of things I have regretted is not saying what I really think. I justify it by saying I don’t like to impose my opinions on others. This thinking backfired on me a few years ago and I regret not speaking up.

A friend I had known since childhood had emailed me that she was having a gall bladder operation. She had a lot of health problems and I remembered her telling me it was dangerous to have an operation because of a blood disorder.

As I read her email, her earlier conversation crossed my mind and I wondered how come she was going ahead with this operation. I had a bad feeling.

Did I ask her about it? No! I replied that a gall bladder operation is quite routine nowadays. I went on to respond with news of what I had been doing.

In closing off my return email I wished her well and said I hoped to see her in the summer. We lived in different provinces but tried to see each other once a year.

I know I could not have affected the outcome but I wish I had picked up the phone and talked to her for the last time and said,

”Don’t do it Linda. I’m really worried about this. The operation it too dangerous for you.”

She wasn’t in pain at the time but had known there were gall stones.

The sad ending of my regret is my friend survived the operation but died a couple days later. Looking back I wish I had followed my instinct and phoned her. Not only to talk but to ask why the surgeon thought it was okay to proceed with the operation.