Welcome to Punday Monday!

New To Punday?

Pull up a stool, order a spiked PUNch, and get to know some of the regulars. I'm your PUNtender, @improv.

How To Make a Pun

This contest is open to everyone. Here's a handy dandy guide on how to make a pun: Learn to Pun

Rules for the PUN-test:

• If you hope to win a prize, your pun must be your original work
• Puns must be relevant to the topic of the week to win a prize, but they can be very loosely related.

Last Week's Punday Monday:

Here is last week's Punday Monday, and all the puns that were eligible to win this week are in the comments!

Hang on to your PUNderwear. The Winners of This Week's PUNday Monday Are...

(GIF by @littlescribe)

Rookie of the Week:

You know, she’s played before, but she’s back. @diebitch!

Pocket Choice Awards:

I am of the opinion that there are four responses to creative works one doesn’t like.
Constructive criticism. Help them get better!
Useful review. Help audience members know which of them will like and which won’t like this piece.
Outdo them. Demonstrate to yourself and others what “good” looks like.
Keep it to yourself.
There is, however, only one way to respond to creative work one DOES like.
Send them POCKET.
What pun was your favorite?
https://steemit.com/pocket/@improv/3glxke-pocket-friday
@theartofori! Thanks for voting him big time @mensa-sig! I also hope folks are checking out each others’ blogs. I’ve seen a few this week, and you all are entertaining folks!

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• POCKET Choice Winner's Circle Season One:

@aloha-creations, @professorbromide, @tcpolymath, @miniature-tiger, @lilygolightly, @chrisroberts, @stinawog, @f3nix, @doctorcrypto, @heroic15397, @littlescribe, @diebitch, @acolucky, @ablaze, and @paul.atreides.

• POCKET Choice Winners' Circle Season Two:

@ablaze, @coinsandchains, @dollarsandsense, @doctorcrypto, @heroic15397, @littlescribe, @jk6276, @acolucky, @deceth, @richatvns, @wpkwolfe, @stanism, @lordoffaux, @blockingback, @theartofori, and @mensa-sig

• POCKET Choice Winners' Circle Season Three:

It’s still season two.

Grand Prize (which isn’t bigger than the other prizes, just grander):

• Best Pun

• Best Pun of the Entire Week

• Best Overall Pun

DRUMROLL PLEASE…..

Bold. I wanted to do a joke about acidophilus, but I couldn’t figure out how to make it work. To be honest, I’m not sure @doctorcrypto made it work. But he tried to do a hard task, and that’s what I’m scoring this by on this particular day.

And What Prizes Do They Win, You Ask?

• Full Strength, 100% Upvote!

Why, as usual, all the punsters got full strength upvotes on their submissions from @improv. This week they also got votes from @freewritehouse! They will next week, too! Together, these upvotes could total in excess of five whole cents!

• SBI

Which are little bitty upvotes on all your content forever. See @steembasicincome for details. I’ll send one to all of our qualified entrants this week!
Our entrants were:
@acolucky, @doctorcrypto, @mensa-sig, @theartofori, @diebitch
Our winners get bonus prize SBI for winning!

Congrats, @theartofori, @doctorcrypto, @diebitch!

• @improv 100% upvote to the post of your choice

Our category winners will each get to choose a post (of their own or someone else's) and I will give that post a fully powered upvote (subject to @improv’s discretion)

This Week's Pun Topic Is:

Asparagus (I’m always choosing these topics while having a snack)

As in,

Why was the asparagus sitting along the aisle during the magic show? She was a plant.

I'm So Good at Puns

If you've never punned before, it might seem like magic! You can do it, too! Learn how in My Free How-To Guide on Punning!

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Sponsors, related content, prizes, and money

Sponsors!

@improv/ @freewritehouse

I mean, am I a sponsor of my own contest? Yes? I guess? Also, because I’m involved in @freewritehouse and they’ve/we’ve hosted Punday Monday events over on that page, I’d like to suggest that they (we) are also a sponsor! Regardless, check out the @freewritehouse community! Furthermore, they/we’re using their SP to upvote your puns!

Related Content:

• @freewritehouse offers writing and word-smithing contests every week
• @steembasicincome has a contest round-up (that includes us) where you can find more opportunities to win SBI.
• @contestkings features our contest and MORE!

Outside referrals that benefit @improv.

Coinbase:

Cryptocurrency exchange Join HERE and we’ll both get $10 of BTC

• Coinbase is adding maker fees, so there’s probably a better way out there. Do you know it?

Robinhood:

Investment platform buying/selling stocks Join HERE and we’ll both get a share of a stock (probably worth ~$4)

Earn.com:

Small tasks for small rewards. Need a business or .edu email, Join HERE and we’ll both get $1 of BTC

Mannabase:

Sign up for universal basic income distribution funded by cryptocurrency Join HERE

Swift:

Yet another attempt at a UBI Join HERE

Swell:

If you’re interested in more traditional investing, Swell invests in stocks that have a positive social impact according to their standards, and has a referral program whereby they’ll match your first $50 investment. CLICK HERE for company website.

M1 Finance

Like Robinhood, like Swell… invest in stocks, but with the auto-fund feature, it does dollar cost averaging for you, and without Swell’s fee. My referral code is here We both get a signup bonus if you use that code.

SBI

Do you like what I do, and want to support me with more than your upvote? Buy me Steem Basic Income, and we’ll both get returns forever! Just send 1 steem to @steembasicincome with @improv in the memo line! Do you want to support the steem fiction writers who are putting out books and getting the name of Steem out there in the wider world, too? Then put @steemfiction in the memo line! Don’t care about SBI yourself? Put @improv:@steemfiction in the memo line, and both those accounts will get the support! (but you won’t. But you’ll get the support of my love.)

LUMENS

We’ll each get $10 of Stellar Lumens if you use this link. You have to answer 5 short questions, each question is worth $2
https://www.coinbase.com/earn/xlm/invite/z8nb4dqf