First Contest I am Hosting
I have decided to host a contest! I am looking for the funniest joke out there. In the comment section below, please share a joke with me. It can be as short as one sentence. Or it can be as long as seven sentences. I am going to determine the funniest joke by the most upvotes within one week. The winner will receive 0.001 BTC. I will get the winner's wallet address and send them BTC. I currently do not know how to send steem power or steem dollars. Any info on that would also be helpful! Thanks in advance!
And let the laughing begin!
Here's mine: A unicorn laughed at Chuck Norris. And that is why unicorns no longer exist.
How many miners are required to mine btc?
1000 -1 to mine and 999 to confirm it.
@funkit Thanks for your joke! It made me laugh out loud! Please ask your friends to upvote your joke!
I believe it!
Two men are playing golf. One of them is about to take a swing when a funeral procession appears on the road next to the course. He stops mid-swing, takes off his cap, closes his eyes, and bows his head in contemplation.
His opponent comments: "That must be the most touching thing I’ve ever seen. You are a very feeling man." The man, recovering himself, replies, "Yeah, well we were married 35 years."
@zoltrix You have three jokes here. You need to choose one. Is it going to be 1) Johnny/Jack 2) golfing husband or 3) scale sucker?
Thanks for playing!
I'll edit sorry. going to go with golfing
Two peanuts were walking down a road. One was assaulted.
I'm not that funny :-(
I like this joke! It's kind of nutty!
hehe i don't get it, please explain :)
Two mushrooms walked into a bar. The first one said, "What you got in your wine cellar, barkeep?" The bartender said, "Port in the attic and mystery in the basement." The second mushroom said, "OH! So we have to choose port or below? Portobello!"
The barkeep said, "Get out, Fun guy!" and the crowd of people I hadn't mentioned yet said, "YEAH! There's not much room! Mush room!"
@improv Thanks for the laugh! I actually smirked and laughed out loud. LOL! You are a fun guy!
You're welcome. Come on by for some good natured punning some time. https://steemit.com/contest/@improv/pun-day-monday-9-contest-week-8-winners-announced
My grandpa has the heart of a lion...and oh yeah... also a lifetime ban at the zoo.
LOL! All I could keep thinking was "Aiya!" Haha... thanks for the laugh! Good luck with getting the most upvotes!
I will bite .
What do you tell a girl with two black eyes ?
nothing she has already been told twice .
@chris777 Thanks for your joke!
SAFE SPACE VIOLATION
ALERT
:P
How do you call a woman that know exactly where her husband is?
-> reveal the answer!
Thanks, @steemmillionaire! Good luck in your endeavors! I am sure you make many others laugh!