COMEDYOPENMIC ROUND #27 - FIRST ENTRY: REAL LIFE 315 OOO$ EPIC HEIST!

in #comedyopenmic6 years ago

STRAIGHT OUT OF A MOVIE!



Who doesn't love a good heist movie? Specially if the scheme to pull it off is as simple as it is effective? When done in movies, it's all fun and games, it's all rehearsed, the pressure isn't real and there are no dire repercussions if one fucks up. Except maybe for unemployement, the worst possible outcome.


But now how about in real life? Imagine the balls it took to orchestrate and to actually follow through with this heist. And to top of it all off, manage to avoid accurate identification, let alone capture. So what happened exactly you ask? Well, let me give you a quick summary.


The conmen involved are allegedly called Nasser El Haj and Said Abdallah, both of whom allegedly represented the Delta Petroleum Services/Rwanda. About 2 months ago, Nasser had approached the owner of Career Center(offices for rent), convinced him to rent them the whole 6th floor, promising that they would pay at a later date, after they had finilized some documents. This Nasser guy must have been quite the charmer to mind fuck the seasoned entrepreneur so good, that he didn't even bother doing his research.


Next, it was time to look the part. So they contacted a furniture company called Fine Furniture Company, and ordered the best decor and equipment money can buy. Around 190 000$ worth, which of course they never paid for. To look even more legitimate, they "hired" about 40 people, who were still learning more about "the business," reporting daily and, eager for the business to officially start, so they can enjoy some of that Arab Money! Spoiler alert, they never did.


Now here comes the end game, figurativ literally robbing blind the forex trade dealers! And it is in this phase that Said, presumably the leader of the One Hit Wonder Duo, finally makes his move. The day starts off normal, Nasser goes to town looking for forex dealers, claiming that they have 270 million RWF and that they need to change it all into $$$! So 315 000$!


They accepted the deal and followed him to the cash cow slaughterhouse. Once in the building, they must have seen how fancy it was and thought nothing could go wrong, as everything in the office looked muy expensive and the location alone commended respect.


Now, enter Said. Who counts the money making sure it's the right amount, he then locks it all in the safe box, which is right in front of the dealers. After that he tells them to wait for him for 30 minutes, after which he'd be back with the RWF equivalent. Deal!


Already counting their soon to be blessings, the dealers sat and waited. 30 minutes quickly turned to 1 hour and then to 1:30 hr. Starting to realize their impending fates, they decided to alert the police and to check the surroundings for any clues, or any other form of reassurement. And then reality hit them! ... They found out that the safe had a built in emergency exit, and that it had been emptied from the other side of the room while they were waiting.


Needless to say that their whole Worlds came crashing down faster than the bitconnect disconnect, that they're still hoping for justice to be served and if possible, get reimbursed. Which unfortunately doesn't seem likely at this point. These sentiments are also shared by the other scammed parties, who still can't believe how all of them are so business oriented and yet, all fell for such a trick.


You should also note that, this is in one of Kigali's most secured and technologically savy areas. It's within 5 minutes walking from both the Kigali Convention Centre (where any creme de la creme meeting happens), and Kigali Heights (Preferred drinking spot when feeling fancy.).


There are also at least another dozen, highly esteemed institutions in the immediate vicinity of the Career Center Building, meaning even a single mistake would have easily gotten them caught. Making the whole heist's success even more legendary! And to be honest, it still baffles me how I still hadn't heard about this story.



Logo design by @gnarlyanimations


Alright, that's it for this post. And although I'm slightly making fun of that ordeal, I wouldn't wish it on anyone, and I sure hope that all those affected will get their money back. It's just some stories be so epic, you just can't help yourself but share them with some funny twists. lol


And how about you, what do you think about this situation? And is just me or does anyone else feel like one, or more of the scammed parties were in on it? Anywho, I nominate @jedau and @madevi to make an entry for the Comedy Open Mic Contest.


Until next time, PEACE!!


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Wow that is some crazy stuff! And you say they never caught the guys who did it?

Yeah man, they're still on the loose and I wonder for how long till they're caught.

Yeah man, they're still on
The loose and I wonder for
How long till they're caught.

                 - ange.nkuru


I'm a bot. I detect haiku.

Hi ange.nkuru,

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I prefer wiskey but I guess beer will do for now.

Wow. That's definitely two sets of brass balls.

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