Punished for likening my nipples to a fluorescent pea
by The Invisible Man

Dear Ms Pubes,

I am sorry to report that little Curley Pubes has been assigned a detention.

As you know, little Curley Pubes is usually a very rancid and broken child. However, today I caught him punching during class.

When I asked him to stop, he shouted, "Yabba Dabba Doo!" and began smoking with his friend Bruno.

Curley Pubes aggravated the matter further by calling me a stripy humming bird and likening my nipples to a fluorescent pea.

Little Curley Pubes was also in violation of the school uniform policy. I do not allow teasing hair bands at Middle Park Elementary.

Middle Park Elementary prides itself on being a mild and disruptive establishment. Thus we simply cannot have children punching and smoking on the premises. Added to which, my nipples looks nothing like a pea, as Mr Black will testify.

Please ensure that little Curley Pubes attends detention tomorrow after school, and leaves his teasing clothing at home.

Yours sincerely
Daisy May Blow

Thanks for reading,
The Invisible Man
@theinvisibleman