China, make it easy. 简化中国

Chinese are complicated. Life in China is hard.
中国人很复杂，生活在中国更复杂。

If you live in China, you need thousands of certifications. For example, birth certification, family member certification, married certification, unmarried certification, resident certification, sexual certification, birthday certification, relationships of people that you living with certification, relationship of your father/mother/sister/borther certification, and the rest of other thousand certifications.

So, why do these certifications bother Chinese so much and what are the functions of these certifications?

First of all, Chinese can not live in China without any of these. Children can not go to schools if they do not have birth certifications, family member certifications, and others. Adults can not work in nomal companies if they do not have married/unmarried certifications.

Simply, no certification = no food/ no education/ no work/ no house. Here is my nightmare experenice:

Theoretically, I should be happy in my first day of my first job. However, accounting to the law, I need to provide all kinds of certifications and one of them is called: unmarried certification. I talked to my manager, if I married or divorced, the resident certification tells. Why do I need to spend so much money by going home and get this unmarried certification? The manager said:"I am sorry, I understand your consider, but that is the law in China and we have to follow it.". I also understand my manager too. So I spent 140￥to get home and went to the local government office. They read my resident certification and said,

"you have other siblings, based on One Child Polity, you need to pay me 1000￥."
Me:"My parents have been paying this for over 27 years! Also, I have not marry yet, why do I need to pay for this? I do not even have a baby."
... (10 mins arguing omited)
She :"Then give me 800￥."
Me:"I don't have money."
She :"How much do you have now?"
Me:"100￥."
She:"Give it to me."

I gave her all of my money and she put the money in her pocket, wrote me the unmarried certification, and told me to leave. I asked her for the invoice since I gave her my money. She stared at me like a crazy wolf, took the moeny out of her pocket, throwed the money and the unmarried certification to the table and said:"Take the money and go to room *** for the invoice!"

你要是住在国内的话，你至少有几百张证明，如果你现在没有，你以后也会有。什么出生证，户口证明，户籍证明，居民证，结婚证，未婚证，户口迁移证明，等等。或者，你可以很威风，很man地挑战天朝的权威说，“老子就是不要这些证明，你拿我怎么样？！”那么你便是寸步难行，不信你可以试试，我就试过了。

第一天上班主管跟我要一大堆证件，其中有一个是我前所未闻，叫做未婚证。已婚未婚在户口都有写，为什么要我千里迢迢回家，劳民伤财去派出所搞个未婚证？ 主管说，“国家规定，就算我们是美国的公司，设立在中国，还是要准守当地法律。”

由于我是打工的，所以就一路颠簸，回去家里的派出所求人家给我未婚证。谁知，后面闹了一场"三国大封相"。

派出所的人看了我的户口本，跟要我1000块钱，说是因为我超生（计划生育术语：有兄弟姐妹），我不给钱，因为我觉得我没有生小孩，计划生育跟我一点关系都没有。就这样，我跟她吵了10几分钟。后来我屈服了，给了她我全副身家（全部财产）那100块钱。她还直接把钱放进兜里，写了未婚证给我。我说我要发票，她听了好像我毁了她一生似得，恨不得把我撕成两半地盯着我，过了几秒，冲我喊道：“带钱到楼上**号房去要”。然后把钱扔给了我。

Furthermore, there are over 100 government offices in one little tiny town. The only function of most of these government offices are asking money from people who need certifications. As what I had experienced, they are allow to ask as much as they want and it is legal. Bank robbers around the world must be jealous if they know the good of being Chinese civil official. That explains why people believe that civil official in China is the best job in the world.

It is hard for me to image how a farmer or worker lives in China by having 1000￥/month（153$). A documentary was made by HK about Chinese people steal into European countries. There is a village in FuQing, China. People crazy about steal into England. Many people die on the way of going to England. The reporter asked the little boy, 9 years old, whose father and uncles just died on the way of stealing into England,
"Would you still want to go to England if you have a chance?"
"Yes.", the little boy said.
Reporter: "But you might die on the way, don't you be afraid?"
Boy:"No, I want to go there to make money and built a new house for my family. My sister can go to school if I have money."

此外，天朝的小城镇里，政府部门大大小小超过一百个。而大部分的这些部门都是靠搞证件来增加收入，就像我经历过的那个女人一样。 这些合法的强盗就这样愉悦地生活着，笑着跳着，像是祖国的花朵。

前几年看过翡翠台的一个纪录片，铿锵集里有一集是说福清有个小村庄的人世世代代为偷渡到海外而费尽心思。这些农民每天的收成只有500-1000块钱。没钱养活自己和家人就把借来的30万人民币给蛇头，期望偷渡到发达国家，吃饱穿暖，光宗耀祖。很多人在偷渡期间因为各种灾难而丢了生命，但是偷渡的人还是勇往直前，因为，偷渡可能会死，但是不偷渡，就一定会死。

看着这些破落的家和贫困的人们，还有各地高大威武的政府大楼。我迷失在这个五千年历史的，曾经辉煌过的国家里。久久沉思，得不到答案。

It is hard for me to image how this famliy lives everyday, since they only make 500￥(77$) every year. This is a documentary in 1997. Today, I have been meeting Chinese people selling Chinese food around U.S., 99% are from fuQing, China. I like to see the smile from their faces. I hope that they can find a better life here.

There is a place, some people's lives are making bank robbers jealous; some people's lives are struggling against the Death. Why don't the people, who should "for people, to people, by people", give a hand for someone who are fighting with the Death everyday?

Adult's world is complicated, a teacher said.

刚来美国就遇到很多中餐外卖车，跟他们聊起才知道，大部分人都是来自福清。他们的笑容是热情的，但是在我看来，又是复杂的。国内上学期间，特别是读高中的时候，要背很多政治书，“政府是为人民服务的...政治职能，经济职能...”。时间过去，很多都不记得了。只是记得，但是总是在想，要是社会跟书本说的是一样的，那世界该是多美好啊。

大人的世界是很复杂的，live 的一个朋友说的。

Pictures are all from Google