Marriage Inclusive, Love Exclusive

in #christianity6 years ago

What quality and quantity of love  is capable of holding a marriage? 

Statistics has proven that what it takes to sustain a marriage is still scarce in the world today. Do you know that in the US, Divorce rates in 2005 were four times the divorce rates in 1955?  This is similar to most part of the world. Does that mean, the love that existed before the seperation/divorce was not great enough to sustain their marriage? Was it mere obsession, or infactuation?

I would like to use a story to illustrate what I think gives the answer to the quesion topic

A Reported story by the Christian Broadcasting Network CBN years ago

Hermin and April's story goes like this

April and her neighbour, Hermin were sweethearts. After ten years of dating, they said   ‘I do’. They had high expectations for their marriage


“Our dating life was such a fairy tale, jusrt thought it was a beautiful fifty years of that”
~Helen
“Our five years was like we were still crushing each other”
~John

Five years into their marriage, Hermin was ready for kids, but  April was reluctant. When she did get pregnant, they were shocked that she was carrying twins… two babies!

“When I called him to tell, he was silent, totally silent, we are planners, we didn’t plan two babies...”
~April

Their two children were eventually born. Immediately, the pressure of being new parents created tension…


“I was mum, he was dad, those were roles, not husband or wife”
~April
”We kinda forgot about each other, so we just focused on the children”
~Hermin

Hermin busy schedule at work, made him slack a little in rendering assistance to taking care of the baby and this pissed April off, She began to complain. Gradually things grew worse, they stoppeed talking to each other. Their marriage was like an egg shell. Her husband, Hermin began to take a defiant attitude, and nothing  concerning the  home mattered much to him anymore April repeatedly threatened Hermin with divorce.

“I didn’t want the divorce. With my heart of hearts, I didnt. I just wanted to scare him and after the fiftieth time, I was just still trying to get his attention.”
~April

Hermin reached his breaking point…

“Hey, this is what you want, this what I’m gonna give you.”
~Hermin
”The pride in me was like fine, but deep in me I was like no!”
~April

Hermin didn’t take time to really pray about it, to ask for  God’s opininon, to get wise counsel. A year after the marriage, the divorce was final. This reality hit Hermin.

“That was when I first had a huge sense of loss. When you are basically, in a place of solitude you got to have a lot of time to think, the late night you’ve got a lot of clarity”
~Hermin

April cried and cried, probably the first month of their divorce. Hermin drove almost every weekend to see the children, and at every occasion, they spent time closely talking to each other.

“The kids were away, so we were not parents, (at that moment) I could focus on him and he could focus on me. The magic that was gone since the baby came out.”
~April.

After nine months, Hermin and April decided to giv their marriage a second chance. They sought a christian counsellor and prayed together regularly.

“I think it was tougher for us, we both had to humble ourselves, it was candid, it was open, it was healing”
~Hermin

Hermin and April completed their counselling just a month before their wedding anniversary. They remarried.


Obviously from the story so far, there love was great, what happened?
1 John 4:8 tells us that God is love. Introducing and acknowledging God in our marriages enables God's love to sustain it. Any marriage with the foundation of God love stands sure.

These are my thoughts, feel free to share yours.

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