Cleaning Out This Old Computer is So F**king Sad

Kind of having a hard time today for a unique reason. My PC is... falling apart at the seams, to put it bluntly. The thing takes 3 hours to fully boot and sounds like the engine of a muscle car. I’ve bought a new machine now, a definite upgrade, from a buddy of mine. He cut me a crazy deal.

The computer I’ve been using is probably 5 years old, i3 potato processor and a cheap motherboard, even at the time. I have a nice GPU though, comparitively! I believe it’s the GTX 990. Outdated now, but works for what I use it for (DS3, The Surge, WoT basically).

I’ve been slowly gearing myself up for the switch of data to the new PC - organizing all of my files and projects into a form I can deal with, backing em up on storage, and transferring them along with all of the programs and drivers I’ll need for the fresh start.

This means navigating through everything that’s built up on that hard drive over the past 5, 6 years, and discerning what to get rid of and what to back up.

Recordings of ——, who was a best friend in the best of times, and cruel and unusual at his worst. Details aren’t necessary, but I always liked his music. He also betrayed a lot of people. I should let it go.

An old project from when ——- and I were still together, singing a duet that she loved. Hard to listen to, but I still did. I probably shouldn’t have.

The 10gb monster file that contains the sounds of Jacuzzi House; amps, drums, and screaming. The way it should be.

—— and I’s old music from high school... He went on to pursue musical theatre/opera in school, and professionally. A prodigy if I’ve ever seen one.

My friend ——‘s songs he recorded with me, an avid artist and musician in Bellingham when I was growing up, and once a counselor at my summer camp. He died a few years back, in a nasty car crash with no seatbelt. I still have my broken skateboard he painted for me at camp, and his acoustic tunes. There are some things you never let go.

Lots of things going through my head today... But one thing seems to stand out. Recording and producing music is so much more than just striving for fame, or getting a check. I know, people say this kind of stupid shit all of the time, but today, I feel that and I know that differently than I do most days. I just sifted through my past friends and experiences through the medium of audio for a couple of hours. Music is just what we do, and it captures moments in time just like a photograph. Looking back is exhilarating as much as it is depressing.