First thing I would point out is that I think this would be a great series for Steemit. You could regularly update us on your progress. I think that would be fascinating. Plus through those updates we can all work together to try to help you through this. Weed is not the problem. Probably the biggest problem facing you right now is actually that you think it is. As long as you blame weed or blame yourself you will never "quit" it. These beliefs will only make you feel worse which causes you to go running to your favorite form of medicine: weed. Even IF you could quit weed without addressing the underlying problem, the odds are you would simply run to an even worse substance like alcohol or opiates. I love Peter Boghossian's quote, "If you don't have the right target, by definition you have the wrong target." Weed is not chemically addictive. You may need it, but you are not chemically dependent on it. What you need to figure out is why you are psychologically dependent on it. Step 1, therefore, should be finding a good therapist. How will you know they're good? When they give you some genuine insight as to why you might be overusing a substance. Hint: if they say it's because you "have an addictive personality" or because, "Weed is just too good," look for another therapist. But they likely won't because they're professionals and that would be moronic. They'll talk to you about your relationships, past traumas, etc. to attempt to search out what it is that is triggering you to smoke so often. Generally it has to do with a deficit of human connection in your life. That both you and your wife smoke so frequently would suggest that your marital relationship is not healthy. This does not mean you should get a divorce. Quite the opposite. I suspect that something is not "right" there but since you two love each other you're attempting to plaster over the problem with weed out of fear that addressing the problem head-on would lead to separation. Pretending the problem doesn't exist, as you can see, will not help and in fact will likely lead to separation. If you want to stop smoking then you should probably enter therapy ASAP as well as couple's therapy. As far as couple's therapy is concerned, I would personally steer clear of any therapists whose focus isn't 100% on saving your marriage. Don't fuck around. It literally can't hurt so you might as well do both right away. If you needed help funding the therapy that could be a good use of this platform. I'd gladly contribute.