I much prefer to be told no than to realize later someone didn't want to say yes.
I use to set up group gaming events for a group to play together. Nothing rubbed me more raw than to be told yes when they really wanted to say no.
The real kicker was, I was 100% okay with them saying no. I was just the poor sap who was willing to set it up. lol
Needless to say, after a couple of yes's that turned to no after much planning. I stopped inviting the ones who did that. One of them had to nerve to act insulted when they were not invited.
You can't please some people. lol
You are right. I try to be a woman of my word. It is hurtful to say yes then not follow through. But it also hurts people too when they have a problem saying no, and they yes, and always follow through because those people usually don't get the same consideration from others and always get the short end of the stick. That is why it is always best to say no when you really mean no because letting someone down when after saying yes sucks; on the other hand, yes people who do follow through can get bitter when things aren't reciprocated and that sucks too.