The Allure of Booty: Yo Ho Yo Ho a Pirate’s Life for Me

in blog •  3 months ago

Ahoy mateys! Reverend Rum, world renowned Steem blockchain pirate and famous storyteller, here.

Ever since I told the story about how I met me parrot Hercules (God rest his soul) and embarked on me pirate lifestyle [https://steemit.com/blog/@reverendrum/a-eulogy-to-me-parrot], I’ve been receivin’ questions about me motives for going along with the command of me parrot. So, today I thought I’d expound upon me reasoning for taking up the mantle of pirate and sailing off to raid the thirteen seas.

So ye see, I originally just decided “Me parrot wants to go to sea, mise go along with the whims of The King of Parrots”. Little did I know at the time that Hercules planned for us to become freebooters, but he clued me in on his plans during our arduous bike adventure towards the harbor. I’ll tell ye some tales from that adventure someday.

“You are my human partner and I require you to don the Triangle Pirate Hat of Destiny, my boy, SQUAWK” squawked The Parrot King, pulling a beautiful pirate hat out of his napsack. It was the most beautiful hat I’d ever seen, and still to this day gazing upon it fills me with joy. “SQUAWK! Wearing the TPHoD(r) is a privilege few have received, Boy. It would behoove you to accept my offer.”

I played it cool: “Well that’s a neat hat, but what else is in it for me?”

“Booty! Booty galore! SQUAWK! Booty, shiny as the sun, as far as the eye can see. Unfathomable levels of booty. Enough booty that you’ll never want for anything again. We will live for the booty. We will die for the booty. The allure of booty is too strong to resist.” Hercules and I drooled a bit, like Pavlov’s dingos.

“Sounds interesting, but you’ve gotta make a better off than that...” I played it cool again, but not cool enough. Hercules saw the glitter in me eyes at the prospect of booty and was not fooled by me facade.

“SQUAWK! BOY, if you intend on deceiving me, know that I will peck out your eye. Do not disappoint me again.”

“Yo ho yo ho a pirate’s life for us!” I gulped.

“You’ve made the smart decision, SQUAWK!”

Now let me tell ya something, me hearties, Hercules was right. There’s plenty of booty to be garnered as a buccaneer! Plenty be an understatement. One time I amassed such a fortune that The Maiden’s Desire began to sink. I had to bury it on a deserted island (I know it’s cliche, but it was bury it or throw it overboard).

Also there’s adventure, swashbucklin, wenches, magic, rum, and most importantly: freedom!

And that’s the tale of how I was coerced decided to take up me career of pirating. That and the fact that me bike was transformed into a pirate ship.

Any other pirates out there on Steemit? Sound off with y’er best YOHO! and I’ll give ye a full upvote from the pirate extraordinaire Reverend Rum. Set sail, friends; until next time!

A collection of topical gifs








Sources (side note, seems people on Giphy seem to have a fundamental misunderstanding of what booty is): https://giphy.com/gifs/picoadw-fun-red-muMcDfcllEWx95S5Ov, https://giphy.com/gifs/picoadw-fun-red-yy2ogxBEXm5NYyszu8, https://giphy.com/gifs/fixed-swiggity-swooty-A7mrYIaSrEl20, https://giphy.com/gifs/ohpmYo0tN21LW, https://giphy.com/gifs/booty-swiggity-swooty-2M0I74Lvwy4O4, https://giphy.com/gifs/swiggity-swooty-cDNzMeAQK1Oog, https://giphy.com/gifs/h1hiCDCnmC0Qo, https://giphy.com/gifs/13QrjsVpNRXX8c, https://giphy.com/gifs/rPRZGCE2GuREc, https://giphy.com/gifs/myltMCEZZpAgE, https://giphy.com/gifs/snl-nbc-3ov9k4g5WOfJolWwtW, https://giphy.com/gifs/treasure-chest-lXiRm5H49zYmHr3i0

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Yarr, yer birdie was a mighty fine birdie. Fer any birdie that likes big booty is good birdie, fer me can not lie. He will be smiling from up above knowing his matey has the best booty der be and now he has more of it that he does not have to share with a bird, as he wants you to have it all and to continue to be merry! God bless yer birdie and your booty!

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Kinder words have never been muttered. Thank you @dynamicgreentk you actually understand booty and will always be welcome on The Maiden's Desire, matey!

Pirates!
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Team Good Alpaca loves this post! Nomnomnomnom!
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Delegate to our project via SteemConnect:
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Arrrrrrrr

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Ye be a pirate as well I see! Well met, matey.

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AYE!

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Well met, lassie! Glad to see another friendly pirate face around these waters. What be your ship's name?

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She is the Witches Tit ;)

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A fitting name for a ship! Will ye sail the 24 seas with me and me fleet, or do you dare take me on as a rival?

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Ah friend I communicate with you from the future my ocean are the stars :) the universe my territory ;)

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Ah, a fellow space-pirate! I see. I've been considerin' outfittin' The Maiden's Desire with some new quantum drives meself! About time for an upgrade...

Well next time y'er in me area, stop by and we can raid together.

I'm still curious though, wings or leg? The devil is in the detail ;-)

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#thealliance #witness

@revenderum
I have been a pirate fan from childhood

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A great thing to be a fan of, matey! Have ye considered enlisting on a pirate ship? All the captains are always looking for new recruits!

You got a 6.83% upvote from @upme thanks to @dynamicgreentk! Send at least 3 SBD or 3 STEEM to get upvote for next round. Delegate STEEM POWER and start earning 100% daily payouts ( no commission ).


Congratulations @reverendrum!
You raised your level and are now a Minnow!

Do you like SteemitBoard's project? Then Vote for its witness and get one more award!

AAAAARRRrrr!
I have me Pirate's Regrets, "The Booty" has brought me many of them...

😂 🤣 😃

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I "LOL'ed" at TWO THINGS:

and:

PAVLOV'S DINGOS

😂 🤣 😃