I think you've just perfectly described me. My wife repeatedly tells me that the only thing she really dislikes about me is how much I hate myself. I don't let myself be myself for fear that no one likes it. But it's insanity, because when I am myself, people love me.
I hope you were able to live up to to this intention of yours. I'm just learning how and it's good to see others doing the same. :)
Sounds familiar. Like how I lived for so long. ¡No mas! That’s not living, frankly. It’s just survival. Just do you and practice breathing through no matter how other people see you. Hugs & strength