LAST HOPE

I don’t even know myself at all
I thought I would be happy by now
The more I try to push it
I realize — gotta let go of control
(Paramore-Last Hope)
Yes you are my last hope.
But are you really my last hope?
I really don’t know

Gotta let it happen
So let it happen
It’s just a spark
But it’s enough to keep me going
And when it’s dark out, no one’s around
It keeps glowing

I’m letting it happen
Hoping and expecting
Even you didn’t said I must expect
I am so confused right now.
What do I feel?
I’m happy when I’m with you but there’s something wrong
We hug and cuddle but it feels so wrong
We tell and share our stories, rants and dreams
Is that what best friends do?
I think it is what best friends do.
Ughh.😞😭
I really don’t know what to feel and to react when you hold me
You said I’m like your little sister
But it feels so wrong that I think It’s not what you want to say
I’m so so confused.

And the salt in my wounds isn’t burning anymore than it used to
It’s not that I don’t feel the pain, it’s just I’m not afraid of hurting anymore
And the blood in these veins isn’t pumping any less than it ever has
And that’s the hope I have, the only thing I know that’s keeping me alive
Alive

Yea you helped me to step forward
Thank you for that
I really don’t feel this before
AWKWARDNESSSS
Hayst. It started yesterday yassss yesterday only
But
I think we will end as best friends only
That’s the best for us