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RE: Why I Domme - My Kinky Manifesto
You can be so reasonable and articulate when you’re not triggered. Well done! Full upvote from me.
I’m fully convinced that consensual BDSM relationships (and, by definition, all such relationships should be consensual) can be incredibly therapeutic. You are probably familiar with the studies done a couple of years ago indicating that BDSM practitioners are psychologically healthier on average than the general population. I think anyone who has practiced it can understand why.
Isn't that true about most reasonable and articulate people?
I haven't looked at those studies, but I am not at all surprised with the result. The question is which is the chicken and which is the egg? Is it that psychologically healthier people seek out the balance of BDSM or is it that there is actual therapeutic value in the practice?
Indeed it is.
Great question regarding the chicken and egg. I know anecdotally that the practice (consensually and properly conducted with a skilled and experienced Top/Dom and a surrendered bottom/sub) can have significant therapeutic benefits. Even transformative benefits. But perhaps that’s because people who are attracted to it are healthier to begin with? I dunno. It’s interesting to ponder.
Personally, I found BDSM to be the perfect place to process my own sexual trauma and reach some kind of equilibrium in my relationship with my sexuality in my early 20s. My therapist raised an eyebrow when I told her about it, years after the fact, but that's because she's an old-fashioned hetero-monogamous lady. To me, the power that comes with Topping has healing properties. I don't know if it works with other people, but I would love to hear about research into BDSM as a treatment for sexual trauma victims.
No studies to back up my statement, so opinion only, but I'm going to guess that those who practice BDSM are generally psychologically healthy people. Disclaimer: those who practice a healthy BDSM relationship. There's a ton of room for confusion in that space. It's been therapeutic for me, as a sub.