BEASTLY TALES

MEDI-CARE?

“Doctor, what is your diagnoses, please?”
“You have a most rare infliction, Muggins Disease!”
“Muggins? Why, that is my name,”
“Surely it cannot be that I am to blame?”
Just a methodology, to show how rare it is you see?
Yes, the only one with Muggins, you do be.
You are the only one on earth,
To have had such an infliction since your birth!
“Perhaps, Doctor, you simply just don’t know.”
“What ails me, from head to toe.”

Fedora Muggins had been seeing his physician,
Hoping for a solution, with medical precision.
A solution to his having no energy or drive,
Hoping, indeed, just to stay alive,
With his doctor, he’d reviewed his case notes,
For various operations he’d gained several quotes.
But would they alleviate his condition?
Would, or could, they bring relief to fruition?
Or would the proceeds just line the pockets of surgeons,
Fund their luxury procurement that burgeons.
Saying, “I’m afraid there is no cure for your disease,”
As they thrust out their hands to grab their fees!

“Muggins disease, so that’s what it is?”
“Should I drink potions that bubble and fizz?”
“Should I pop pills that serve other ills?”
“What about lotions made from porcupine quills?”
“What about a tonic from herbs hydroponic?”
“Perhaps nuclear medicine, from origins most sonic?”
“Whatever the curative factor is please,”
“I want to see the back of Muggins disease!”

Medical Research has begun, into this unfortunate disorder,
Funds were raised, north and south of the border,
And it wasn’t long, before a breakthrough was made,
And a ready cure became stock and trade!
“Muggins Disease? Oh, we’ll fix that!”
“It can be cured at the drop of a hat!”
“Simply start with a very slow sauna,”
“Then a brisk walk, looking at flora and fauna.”
“Finally, start a long course of these little green pills,”
“You’re on the pathway to curing your ills.”

A medical breakthrough, at last!
A nice, relaxing drink, a lovely repast!
Enjoy life, without a debilitating condition.
Then continue to prosper with correct nutrition.
And that’s precisely what Fedora Muggins did.
Singing out loudly, “I wouldn’t be dead for a quid!”