Zeus & The Barber- Children's Story

Zeus always likes to look his best. As the God of all Gods, he has to look important, well styled, and dressed for his fellow Gods. Every week Zeus has his beard and hair trimmed at his local barbers. He was very particular about his hair cut. It had to be every week and only trimmed by half a centimeter. 

On this particular day, Zeus prepares for his outing and puts on his fine white linen clothes, so all his admirers can see him looking his best. As he arrives he expects to find his regular barber John, but to his dismay, he enters the shop to find a young man greeting him instead of his regular barber John.

“Hey....you must be Zeus. My name is Nathan, I'll be cutting your hair today.”

Zeus looks on in horror.

“ You certainly will not be young man. Only John cuts my hair. Where is he? I demand to see him.”

“Sorry Zeus,  John's on his hols. He’s on a retreat to…”

“It's God to you. Well, why didn’t I know about this? He should run any retreats by me first. He knows how important my image is.”

“Zeus...God... I mean....obvs.... I can guarantee I will cut your hair professional. You will look phat man!"

"How dare you..!"

"No dude, listen. Phat means good, like cool...yeah? All the other Gods will be well jel, you'll be like a new God!"

“I don’t want to be a new God, I want to be an old God. I mean I want to be me, myself.”

“I can do that. Sit down bruv.All will be fine!"

Zeus is dubious but takes a seat anyway. Nathan picks up his scissors as if he was starting to cut Zeus’s hair.

“Wait...young man I only have half a centimetre taken off. No more no less. Half a centimeter of my head and half a centimeter from my facial hair too.”

“Ok, a centimeter off head and beard.”

“NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO...half a centimetre. And it's not a beard. It's facial hair!”

“Ok you're Godliness, no problem. You just sit there and chill man. Al is well!"

Nathan starts to cut Zeus’s hair. Zeus starts to relax, thinking about his chores for the rest of the day. As Nathan finishes he brushes the hair from Zeus’s shoulders, and removes his cloak. 

Zeus opens his eyes and looks at his new hair cut. He is not happy with the result!

“What have you done?” he roars across the salon, making all the shelves shake and the staff too.

“I did as you told me to God. 1 centimeter from the head and from your beard, I mean facial hair”

“NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO…half a centimetre! I look ridiculous. I’m going to be the laughing stock of the kingdom”

“Ahhhh man... it doesn’t look any different from before.”

“Now you try to insult my intelligence. Young man, you will be punished.”

Zeus wasted no time, and with his godly powers, he delivered his punishment.

“You will now know what it’s like to not have enough hair."

 Nathan looks in the mirror. His head shone in the reflection.His thick black hair had now gone.

“Good day young man. I hope you have learned your lesson.” 

Zeus storms out of the shop and hurries home before anyone could see him. He rushes upstairs and finds the only hat in the house. 

It was one of Hera's with a flower on it. 

Hera comes home to find Zeus sat at the table with a floppy hat on.

“Husband, what are you doing wearing my hat?”

“Wife, I have had an awful day.” He explains to his wife about the events at the barbers.

“That is truly awful, but can I ask you something?”

“Yes wife, go ahead.”

“Why, do you not use your powers to grow your hair back?”

Zeus looks at his wife. 

“I wonder wife. Who do you think is the most intelligent in the house?"

Hera chuckles as Zeus grows his hair back.

The end