Divorce and children effects and how to reduce them
Divorce is one of the most important pests that afflict our modern society because of its devastating negative effects on society as a whole. But we will dedicate our conversation today to raise some points that we want to mitigate these effects on children, as they are the first and most affected by this problem.
So we will try to understand together how divorce affects children and what parents can do to reduce these effects as much as they can.
How does divorce affect children?
Children’s reactions vary according to several factors, such as age, the prevailing culture in society, perhaps even the size and type of the problem between parents, but there are effects that we notice on most children who go through this experience, including:
Tendencies to loneliness and avoidance of social activities.
Parents’ divorce is accompanied by children’s feelings of guilt and some wrong ideas dominate their minds, such as thinking that their family is the only one going through this experience, or that they did not do their part to prevent the divorce, which leads them to reduce their interactions even with their small circle of acquaintances.
Possible involvement in criminal activity.
As a result of the absence of good role models and sufficient attention in many cases, the child pushes the child to take his principles from the street, which increases the likelihood that he will commit criminal acts upon reaching adulthood.
Feeling angry and depressed.
When the parents separate, there are several changes in the children’s routine and they are deprived of many activities that were the reason for their enjoyment, especially those that require the presence of the parents together, which disturbs the mood of the children constantly and puts them in states of anger and depression.
Poor educational attainment.
One of the negative and direct effects of divorce on children is the low level of schooling, and this is due to the child’s preoccupation with thinking about the events that occur around him, which causes a lack of concentration or even a loss of desire to study.
What should parents do to help their children overcome this problem?
Not taking children’s lives into consideration or not making plans to support them and help them adapt to life during and after divorce will lead to several problems, often because they are the weakest and most affected party in the equation, Therefore, parents must adhere to several important points:
Not arguing in front of the child.
Keeping the details of the dispute between the parents away from the children is very important because the parents’ continual disagreement in front of the children leaves a bad impression on them, and the exchange of insults leads to drawing a bad picture of the parent, and perhaps both of them in the child’s mind, which causes the child to lose confidence in himself.
Listen to the boy, understand his concerns, and suggest solutions.
Children’s minds are dominated by several ideas about the reasons for divorce and how their lives will be after it. They usually create bad scenarios, so they must be listened to and try to discover their fears, suggest solutions to them. Usually, the questions that revolve in his head are about who will live with him and whether he will constantly see his other father, and to what extent he will change a decision Separation is his life.
Keep yourself available as much as possible.
The most difficult period for children after divorce is the first period because they are accustomed to having parents in one house As soon as one of them is absent, the child loses the feeling of safety and may have thoughts that he may lose the other as well, so it is better for the parents to stay by his side as much as possible in the first period.
Maintain respect between parents.
No matter how great the problems between parents, they must remain outside the children's awareness because using them as a means of revenge or to insult the other party will cause them psychological problems that are difficult to treat in the future, while understanding between parents gives a feeling of reassurance and helps children adapt to the situation quickly.
Children’s response to any change may be difficult in the beginning and more difficult if this change affects all aspects of his life, so parents must deal with the matter as soon as it occurs because the effects of divorce may be dire for society as a whole and not only the family or children if it is not dealt with as it should.
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