I'm depressed!

That’s it. I’m officially depressed. I just took this online test and it says I should see a doctor immediately. And I got an incentive - a $25 discount for some clinic. Prices are cheaper here so I suppose this covers about half of the first appointment, hopefully.
Obviously not the meds and since I don’t have insurance the cost for the medication will probably be enough to send me even deeper into depression.

OK, I’m joking. You know I don’t believe in doctors much, but I did take the test.
I just happened to click on a very click-baity title that said something like ‘See if you have the disease that…’. I tend to do this quite often because I’m always interested in the official narrative. It’s my rule of thumb - see what they tell you and assume the opposite is true.
This depression test I know it’s meant to make you spend some money on doctors and meds. I know I’m not really depressed and all I need is getting over some family issues and see some positive movement on the cryptomarket. That or a letter telling me the millionaire uncle I never knew I had just died… (well, I do have siblings, but I’m not sharing my fortune with them!)
Enough with the jokes, though, because the way depression is being shoved down out throats is not funny at all. Before taking the test I was reading an interview with a doctor, one with many titles to his name, someone important I guess. An expert. And this expert advertising the online testing was saying that we have to face it ‘depression is a global phenomenon and we have to accept many people will suffer from it’. The way he said it, it sounded like depression is a sort of catching disease, like the plague or the Spanish flu. Something you cannot escape. Seriously, how can someone trust a doctor who says such stupid things?
Also today I discovered another article ‘debunking’ all alternative therapies for cancer. All of them, diets, CBD, ozone therapy, basically nothing works. I will not pretend to say I know these therapies work, but what really got to me was the warning that these alternative therapies ‘could be dangerous to your health’. First of all, when you’re dealing with cancer and chemo you don’t have much health anyway. Drinking some juices or taking large doses of vitamin C cannot possibly damage your overall health. Certainly not more than chemo and radiation…
But they don’t want you to try anything else. Just follow the standard treatment and see if you make it…
I almost forgot, the same article said not even positive thinking helps!!! Wait, what??? So telling yourself you can beat this doesn’t actually help? Obviously, what you should do is admit you’re depressed and take some meds. I’m not making this up. I did some research on heart conditions, as my mother is not well these days, and I did find articles saying patients should be put on depression medication. My mom is indeed depressed, but what would make her snap out of it is actually feeling better, which no amount of depression meds can do.
That’s what depression medication is for - make you feel calm and happy, ignore what’s ailing you - whether a physical problem or, more often, the psychological problems associated with your drab unsatisfactory life.
Reading such articles, no wonder I’m depressed…