BEASTLY TALES

THE SMUGGLER

Smugglers are found all over the globe,
Yes, just anywhere you care to probe.
But the first part of our tale is Cornwall County.
Where there was a Smuggler’s bounty.
On liquor from Holland and France,
Financially worthwhile to take a chance,
With Customs and Excise, to be precise.
Yes, for smugglers it was indeed very nice,
To smuggle spirits and wine and cognac most fine.
All without customs duty any,
For the Government not a penny.
From all of Europe, particularly France,
The smugglers led customs a most merry dance.
Bringing in illicit alcohol by the gallon or ten,
They were indeed most merry men.

Yes, the Government would go off to war at the slightest pretence,
Which, I’m sure you’ll agree, didn’t make much sense.
They would fund such frivolous action,
From taxes on the poor, the opposite faction.
Now if normal taxes were not enough,
They would make up new ones in the rough.
For example, the tax on imported grog,
Whilst the law maker, a politician continued agog,
To live sumptuously high on the hog.
Yes, after all those expense paid lunches,
They then attacked poor folk with those new tax hunches.
We’re talking about eighteen thirty,
But today things are similarly dirty.

Yes, Governments make decisions not smart,
For them, it seems to be quite an art.
Like prohibition in the U.S.A.,
Around the 1920’s period day.
This brings us to “bootleggers” the smugglers of their day.
Who used fast cars to cross county line,
Evading the police and jail and fine.
All these types of stupid laws do finesse lack,
The politicians making them should get the sack.