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RE: Baby baby.

in #31sentencecontest2 years ago (edited)

You should write more often. It's a good story.

When I read a story I don't read it for a surprise. There was no surprise. It was kind of obvious that the man's going to get it.

Rather I read it for how it makes me feel overall. Some story ends in such a way that they grab you by the throat. This story wasn't like that. But it gives you the feeling of "I told you so." And something else.. What? I am trying to pulpate. it

It gives you a feeling of futility and inevitability of death. Approaching death. Of its inescapability and destruction that it leads with it. A realization that youth is given to us only once and it is s mechanism of pumping babies. And once that task is done, people have wasted vessels. )))

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Oh dear, kind of obvious? Really? No surprise? Not even a tiny one? You cut me to the quick!
As to writing, I do. It's the posting I have a problem with.

I hope this isn't a disappointment as this is the principle of a novella - unexpected and yet justified end. So it all was done well - within the genre where if you think about it you as a writer don't have that much of a freedom. The story begs a boolean outcome: a man either going to be praised for his ill-doing or punished. Any other resolution will be anticlimactic. For example, if he'd be hit by a car. This could have happened in real life, but in a story, this makes no sense.

So again as a writer you are down to two possibilities. Which one to pick? A broad audience reader is already sedated enough to expect that the male character will succeed. So it's the time to strike a blow - the option #2!

The rick is to make it in the way that it is justified. The reader should say "How could I not see such an obvious thing" rather than
That couldn't have happened." You've done it well. So be proud! )

My reply was an attempt at humour. Your original comment made me laugh and I was trying, unsuccessfully, to answer in kind. Thanks as always for the stimulating conversation. You're a mine of information.

hahaha... I don't want to take this kind of risk. I'd rather become an object of a smirk than ... well you know what I mean.

Here's one of my novellas

https://steemit.com/fiction/@mgaft1/gentle-look-an-original-short-story

Oh... and have a very happy New Year!

Very good and I didn't see the ending coming at all.

Thank you! That makes me proud )

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