Good for you to both come back to the bikram room, to heal, and only then to leave it. That's amazing, as it also has given you so much, it would've been shame to have no good 'last memories' of it at all.

I'm shocked to hear the training/teaching was so nasty and mean. In the one class I did I had a different experience, it was stretched you could only do what you can do with your body, and I was told to at least sit out the 90 minutes, even if I wanted to skip poses, as sitting it out would be an accomplishment at all. When I couldn't do the poses the teacher also regularly showed me what I could do - something I expect from yoga in general.

Maybe it's a generational change, maybe it's not.

It's so rough to feel week, and as I've had issues with the SI-joint as well in the past I know a bit about it. I remember the feeling of not begin able to stand up straight and literally find any balance in my body. It's a horrible feeling. Worse than the pain actually.

Glad you're now onto better fitting yoga that actually makes you listen to your body <3 That's the most important thing. Challenge it from your strengths and weaknesses.

Thanks again for taking the time and effort to write this piece <3