Thoughts on Suicide from Someone with Severe Depression Experience
The thing that really bothers me about suicide isn't something you'd typically expect...
While there are lots of aspects of suicide that are important, and consistently demand attention in both the online and offline worlds, such as seeking help, sharing experiences, opening up to others, death toll figures, causes, and motivations, the one I'd like to speak about today is entirely different.
At this point you're probably wondering to yourself what I might talk about, and probably also hoping this isn't another one of those generic copy-paste self-help posts that you can find strewn around online. Well, it's not. This post is blunt, and rightfully so, because I'm tired of seeing things like this happen. You've been warned. While I do care for the people that suffer from depression and the struggle of everyday life and the temptation of suicide, this is not the topic of this post.
The topic of this post are the victims and senseless deaths caused by said person's suicide.
If you decide to take your own life, for any number of complicated reasons, that is your own choice. It's your own life. What is NOT your own, are the lives of the people around you. If you're going to commit suicide, and you've actually dedicated yourself to doing it and not just talking about it, and you choose to do it in such a way that endangers the lives of others in the vicinity, you're a selfish piece of shit.
While the above statement might seem harsh, let's take a moment to understand what I mean. If someone chooses to drive head-first into the oncoming lane of traffic because they've lost their will to live, they're part of the problem. If someone chooses to start their car in their garage and fill their house of loved ones with carbon monoxide, that's a problem. If someone decides to take their own life by setting their house ablaze, risking the lives and property of other people in the house or neighbors, that's a massive problem.
Not every attempted suicide is a danger to others. I would say a good majority are fairly private and harmless except to the person committing the act.
However, how could someone even consider committing such an act that would put others in danger?
I have personally struggled with severe depression for most of my life, witnessed some horrible, jaw-dropping moments from within my own family, been in some very, very dark times, and I have never, not even once, considered taking someone else with me if I were to commit suicide.
How could someone be so selfish? They're unhappy with their life, maybe they've lost a couple marbles, but they decide to take an innocent, happy person into that pit of despair with them? They're going to deprive them of love, of freedom, of life, in an act of self-hatred? How could someone even find logic in that at all?
I understand that when people are in the suicidal mindframe, logic is not their strongest feature. But taking their own life in a way that could potentially end and ruin other people's lives? Why should they get to decide that the people around them don't get to live anymore, just because they're depressed?
I could ask these questions all day, and I'd never have any answers, but I wanted to take a moment and describe my feelings towards this little-spoken subject. So many posts and articles and books are dedicated to the people that commit suicide, but hardly anything is done to speak for the surrounding victims. It doesn't happen often, but when it does, it's an atrocity. And that's what really bothers me about suicide.
A power statement! I think people do often not consider this as part of the tragedy of suicide.
My friend committed suicide in an unorthodox way. If he was going to do it, I am glad it wasn't going to harm anybody else or leave himself mutilated. We even can make a joke or two about it now and then.
Sorry to hear about your friend mate, but thanks for posting and sharing. :)
Powerful and brave to say what we often think when someone close takes their own life. I wrestled with these very questions when someone close to me did. Ultimately we cannot judge them by our rationale as to carry out this action puts their mindset on another level from those of us who cannot comprehend it. It still hurts though
Keep up the great work @voltarius
Upvoted
The thing, though, with suicide is that the real victim(s) are always someone other than the one who commits the act.
Yes the person is dead. But the people who carry the repercussions are the those around them. When someone commits suicide the victims are the ones left behind to carry the grief and feelings of guilt.
What about people who don't think about who will find their body? I know a man who hung himself and his son found him hanging. Think about the trauma of that.
When people take their lives in a way that physically harms or kills others it's an extension of this 'collateral damage'.
Suicide almost always has collateral damage. It's one of the major reasons to try to reduce it or tackle it as a societal ill. If it were truly just a personal decision, we could just let it be.
You're right! Thanks for your feedback!
Nice! All the dark days have given you enough time to think about what others haven't. Everyone is different, I'm sure it won't be the same reason for everyone, to get the answers you'll have to dive into the lives of people who are about to commit such horrendous acts(no offence).
Not gonna lie, I can't read this (depression issues of my own) but I upvoted the shit out of it for being ballsy enough to write it.
Fair enough, Steemian. I appreciate your support regardless. Depression and suicide are not pleasant topics to discuss or read about, so I don't blame you for shielding yourself. :)
Well I don't think it is really a suicide if it threats on purpose the life of someone else. It may still have to do with depression but going full retard on everyone without a reason would be more of a mental problem? Or maybe "religious call"?
Yet suicides are a very sad thing, as you said the thing that suffer the most is the people you hurt by leaving.
Any suicide can be selfish, because little to no one is entirely void of relationships with others. However, calling them selfish won't discourage their suicide necessarily nor will it help solve the problem. What I think you've done well is identify a problem, but I think you're attacking it the wrong way. Perhaps try doing research on what is available out there for dealing with suicidal others.
I think you're taking my point the wrong way. This post isn't about the people who are committing suicide, there's already plenty of stuff dedicated to them. This is about the people that get caught in the cross-fire of someone else's self-hatred. This post isn't meant to solve anything, I'm just saying that it's selfish and ignorant for someone to kill themselves while also endangering the lives of others. The people around them are the topic of this post.
I don't understand what you're trying to accomplish with this post though.
I agree it is selfish and I'm sorry to hear you have dealt with these types of thoughts before.