The Trial, Part 1
This post was co-published at talanhorne.com. You may find it has better formatting on the other site.
![](https://steemitimages.com/640x0/https://i1.wp.com/talanhorne.com/wordpress/wp-content/uploads/2018/12/Courtroom.jpg)
It feels like we've been here forever.
Mr. Devil's Advocate: "The wheels of justice turn slowly. Trust me: this is normal."
I guess it doesn't matter what happens here. As long as they kill me with dignity, I won't complain.
Mr. DA: "Woah, woah, woah. We've talked about this. Nothing bad is going to happen. I have defended Lucifer himself in courts all across the world, and I never fail to get my client off the hook. How much easier for someone who I know is innocent?"
Funny how that doesn't reassure me. Should I be proud of having the devil's own lawyer working my case?
Mr. DA: "You're asking the wrong question. People don't need virtuous lawyers. They need effective ones. And you hit the gold mine with me."
I still have a bad feeling about this.
Mr. DA: "Good. Use that to look contrite. People love it when you're sad."
That has me rethinking some of my life choices.
Bailiff: "All rise."
Mr. DA: "And here we go."
Bailiff: "The court is now in session, the honorable Justice Byclericalerror presiding."
Justice who?
Mr. DA: "I advise you not to make fun of his name. The Byclericalerror dynasty has a long and storied history, and the family is powerful in this state."
Justice Byclericalerror: "Be seated."
Bailiff: "Your honor, today's case is the United States of America v. Thomas Alan Horne."
JB: "Are both the prosecution and defense ready?"
Mr. DA: "Your honor, the defense stands ready to proceed with the trial, but...the prosecution has not yet arrived. Given the circumstances, I have to wonder if the state is unable to prosecute my client."
JB: "Nice try, Counsel, but we are aware of the state's reason for tardiness. There has been...a last minute change to the docket."
Mr. DA: "Excuse me?"
JB: "I'm afraid the prosecutor has been...waylaid by an act of God, and will not be joining us. Luckily, a replacement has been appointed."
Mr. DA: "And why was I not informed? Your honor, this is most irregular. I demand to know who is prosecuting this trial."
JB: "Oh, I believe you are already familiar with her...."
Her?
*Bump, bump-pa-dum, bump-pa-dum, bump-pa-dum-pa-dum-pa-dum."
![](https://steemitimages.com/0x0/https://talanhorne.com/wordpress/wp-content/uploads/2018/12/Womans-legs.gif)
*Bump, bump-pa-dum, bump-pa-dum, bump-pa-dum-pa-dum-pa-dum."
![](https://steemitimages.com/0x0/https://talanhorne.com/wordpress/wp-content/uploads/2018/12/Flaming-legs.gif)
*Bump, bump-pa-dum, bump-pa-dum, bump-pa-dum-pa-dum-pa-dum."
![](https://steemitimages.com/0x0/https://talanhorne.com/wordpress/wp-content/uploads/2018/12/Shadow-legs.gif)
Am I missing something? Does the courthouse share a wall with a big-band jazz club?
Mr. DA: "I'm afraid you don't understand. This...is bad. Very, very bad."
Well, can you do better than give me a vague foreboding about it?
Mr. DA: "You'll see soon enough."
See what, exactly?
![](https://steemitimages.com/0x0/https://talanhorne.com/wordpress/wp-content/uploads/2018/02/Wes-Anderson-Opening-Doors.gif)
Mr. DA: "Here she comes."
JB: "The court recognizes the prosecutor in the case of USA v. T. Alan Horne. You've kept us waiting, Miss Downarrow."
![](https://steemitimages.com/640x0/https://talanhorne.com/wordpress/wp-content/uploads/2018/12/SharonStoneBasic.jpg)
Prosecutor Downarrow: "Occupational hazard, your honor. But rest assured that I am prepared, and all too glad to fill in." *Glides across the courtroom to her seat.* "We have no objections to proceeding."
Sorry, am I supposed to know who she is? We have a different prosecutor, sure, but the case itself hasn't changed. What's the big deal?
Mr. DA: "You have no idea."
![](https://steemitimages.com/0x0/https://talanhorne.com/wordpress/wp-content/uploads/2018/12/Basic-Instinct-Legs.gif)
PD: *Swivels her chair to face the defense.* "Hey, baby."
BABY?!?!
Mr. DA: "Uh...hey, Valerie. Nice to see you again."
PD: *Mouths the words:* "Miss you."
Okay, you have three seconds to explain what's going on.
Mr. DA: *Sigh* "Fine. Mr. Horne, this is...an old friend, who just happens to be the most ruthless prosecutor on Earth, and who has never lost a case."
You mean she's your...
Mr. DA: "My ex, yes."
Great. Just my luck.
To be continued...
@talanhorne,
Haha that's funny! Wish to read the next part of it!
Cheers~
Good writing knowledge about very difficulty. great article and thanks for sharing
Thanks @talanhorne
Have a wonderful day.
It turned out well, the main thing is to do everything in good faith with an interesting selection of hyphas and it will turn out interesting. thank you for message
I really liked the first part of this post i want to know who will replace the ex i mean she's so beautiful, i want to see part two. Regards
interesting part 1 very different to read after such a long time will be waiting for the next one :)
@talanhorne You have received a 100% upvote from @botreporter because this post did not use any bidbots and you have not used bidbots in the last 30 days!
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Most interesting conversation you built up here.
I'm loving your awesome part of writing style. Thanks and have a nice day.
Sometimes there has funny moments. Animations selections very suitable to this talking of them. Smart article @talanhorne
Ooooo having your ex prosecuting your case, that's some bad luck right there. I like the imagery choice in the article :)
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Congratulations @talanhorne
Now you are in the MinnowsPower Loyalty Member List...!!!
Exceptional writing & excellent story mode article...!!!
100% Upvoted by @MinnowsPower