Ridiculing Merchants of Capital: ‘Rich Dad, Poor Dad’

Robert Kiyosaki’s ‘Rich Dad, Poor Dad’ depicts 20th century+ brazen ‘self’ selling cohesively in its fashioning/devouring of a dissected idolatry, a typical charlatan populism for impressionables; repulsively imperial, helplessly disjointed in substantiating anything, monotonously dopey (‘look at my wretched ‘poor dad’, if simply you do X everything will resolve itself’) - platitudes for a repressive, passé ‘manifest destiny’.

101 for avoiding constructive, totalizing pop-crusades, wherein really an instantiation of regressive modernist literature [though mentioned a degraded version thereof]. Would prefer a wordless novel to this undeserving ‘book’-advertisement selling its own indications to a libidinally-inducing title (& hysterical incantations:

‘‘Behold thee slavish mortals waging in your everyday labours, ‘I’ ‘humble’ eminent-RICH-Kiyosaki (may gilded-reviewers-reinforce-my-name) have answers to your long-awaited, much toiled, recurrently despaired tidings; ‘I’ alone can unearth the reasons for your shortcomings, your financial biases, pernicious habits, solely ‘I’ can reprove your as-now inaccessible aqueducts to sea-green fiat - Let it be! Oh Lord $ Let it be!; all abilities ‘gained’ by experience of course! But first there must be an administrative test, to check that you possess rudimentary language abilities, for it is one of my 5 Kiyosaki-Know-how’s [the other four available for $, in other ‘books’ mindful] -K: another one of my delightful phrasings! ‘Mindfulness’ must be applied at all interactions, positive strength affirmed & reinvigorated constantly, appropriately; for naturally, every conversation is an opening to a potential business ‘opportunity’!

Now again to induct you into the Kiyosaki-RICH programme [puzzlingly enough there exists a further induction afterwards into the Kiyosaki ‘Abode-Of-Eminents’, of which qualities are debatable], a 5 [again -K loves echoes of anything that indicates or smells pesto-ish, something to do with pentagrams or ‘occult magic’] year ‘intensive CASH-generating-program [RICH as the aim, CASH as means ergo explains why ‘RICH-programme’ possesses an affix ‘me’ to signal the extra ‘millions’ earned at ‘completion’, although ‘in reality’ all ‘successful participants’ are indebted [by contract, signed at inception year-zero; -K would assure you it is a ‘positive debt’ variety] for a ‘meager sum of $50,000’ to be ‘allowed into RICH+ Qualified Investments’ [-K’s words]].

RICH+, which inaugurates one into the ‘Abode-Of-Eminents’ [provided gross ‘wealth’ doesn’t fall <2,000,000, debt is encouraged; any failures remove this induction]; ‘‘assures flexible, definitive returns in a non-promissory trading environment because of high yield, low risk fin-tech stocks (50%), the other 50% proportioned 50/50 into 5-10 year treasury bonds & cash; as advised [not commanded] by RICH-Kiyosaki himself’’ no capitals as ‘regular-cash’ is ‘explicitly’ for ‘‘provisional low-risk ‘stable’ exposure, not an ‘honorable CASH method’’]. CASH completion is obligatory before the ‘RICH’ designation could be positioned before your ‘participant’ name [as was reserved for Kiyosaki par excellence]. -K returns feverishly to his monologue.

‘‘Can you say cash-flow? Qa-s-sshh flow! Yes, pronounce the declarative S slowly to release its full force, feel milky smoke rise within you, this is its leafy vines sprouting aflame [that this perhaps signifies the audience’s wasting of ‘capital’ to -K was lost on both], jewelled-emeralds outspoken in radiant luxor will soon appear! Powerful ‘class’-surmountings have begun! Can you not see your possessions fructifying eagerly, are not your foods multiplying bountiful; this autonomous compounding that ceaselessly wills & fetishistically desires its own superfluity, blessed by the money-sage himself!? Hear the glorious beasts’ roars tearing the imposing rulers heads apart, violent happiness detaching these steadfast obstacles to ‘‘self’ improvement’’, condemning those monarchists who sanctioned educative ignorance [‘did you not learn this in ‘school’?’] as the anciens that they stubbornly are, clinging to suckle protectory bourgeoisie supports for ‘capital’ access! Their despondent cries of gluttony are unwelcome here, for the complicit rafters have been sunk, the revolutionary epoch is upon us; the waves of ‘capital’ are unleashed!

Are you listening my brethren in arms? Have not the winds of beneficent change truly arrived henceforth, hereafter and evermore? Feel this tempestuous newfoundland with all your fibers formerly unrecognizable & abandoned by you, embrace its spasmodic forms & reflexive permutations; wonder at its happiness & unexpected, unknown excitations – for today is the moment for the free spirit of ‘capital’ available to all; regardless of petty trifles & insignificances of surface, this day circumscribed into the veins of historicity! Allowing this between-space for a ‘new’ liberatory subject to arise! To arrange financial statements, budgeting responsibly, & most consequentially for utilizing ‘good debt’, for engaging with stock-derivatives; these ‘exotic’ instruments are henceforth available, your burdened yoke of caste struggles through generations will soon be over, monetary fetters unlocked, so rejoice with me for you will be an entrepreneur, have positive Qa-s-sshh flow, you will be RICH! Hallelujah ‘mighty’ $!!’’ (Kiyosaki repeats the cliché for an unfathomable time beyond which would be tolerably repeated in any other setting; how can these ‘aspirants’ - what to call them? - be so ridiculously naive, so foolishly arrogant to expect instant changes in ‘fortune’!—'Life' was a game to them, see Kiyosaki’s ‘self-ennobled’ ‘CASHFLOW’ shit-board, how laughably deplorable! [The witness himself wasn’t remarkably affluent in goods, but what did that matter, he had enough provisions for living without too much excess, albeit wouldn’t be ludicrous -conditioned!?- enough to believe this performance (for this was merely what it was, its exclusive ‘successes’ being those that convinced the spectator), a quackery frequently repeated in differing forms & with ever changing-faces, even if by the same ‘person’].

‘‘For their incessant cravings desire with you, repeat these ‘sacred’ choruses passed through ‘entrepreneurial’ strivings, ‘actualize’ your knowledge, bless their ‘wealth’-condusive affordance with gratitude, and thou will become RICH! R-I-C-H! RI-TCHH!’’ - Kiyosaki becomes deliriously ecstatic, gesticulating widely, eyes bulging, rattling hand back and forth, back and forth, clutching some S-shaped prayer beads with a mysterious line crossed vertically through center; objet appearing to palpitate as diverse lines intermix, sliding effusively between one-another, paths-crossed, wildly heterogeneous,—making the ragged initiates tremble (they had to pay all their savings to enter Kiyosaki’s ‘sacred’ grotto, some had scarcely enough spares to eat for a few days, their children moaning for nourishment [he ‘daringly’ remarked, the outside onlooker reported, that the child be slain: ‘‘May the blood enliveth these scaly amethysts to greater heights! ‘I’ who speak to you now, eminent-RICH-Kiyosaki, ask you, entreat you, plead with you (this third utterance whispered to but himself, the participants becoming more enamoured with him; thinking it an unintelligible additive spell), to answer if sacrosanct blood be not granted for my convents wishes for RICH-ness!’ – the external observer, espying these actions through pockets of ventilation arousing noxious vapors (he was afraid of its possible toxicity), whom previously warned these desperate-erratics not to sell their houses, repudiate their livelihoods, rupture cordially loving relationships, families renounced, acquaintances shunned; anybody whose ‘interests’ (all language was trained by Kiyosaki with such precise-logorrhea) didn’t correspond with their fanaticism for his symbols & terms [CASHFLOW, CASH, RICH, $ WORSHIP, ‘POOR WRETCH’ referring to the ‘other’, WEALTH] were discarded, censored, trashed into intentional amnesia. Such is the ‘nature’ of the ‘go-getter’ [and for what is he furiously rushing for, unheeding of grounding nor steps – when a reflective specter pursues?]; his lonely function is to sever, disassemble, interjecting delicate apprehension. Only in posterity did terrene inhabitants learn, remember & acknowledge their ‘unconscious’ remembrances – just how much blood was spilled on these forsaken plains of desolation

(for the translucence of pores for the eye were blocked during such a phrenetic, lamentable ecstasy, as though a protective sphere was concealing thought, a matrixal nucleolus stirring unfinished, chanting intensifying-hymns, incomprehensible sans their reverberations painful irrespective-of-‘being’; broiling with almost orgasmic fervour—and the perceiver felt an impenetrable gaze scrutinizing ‘ze’ as another to-be colonized object)).

Note: Designation ‘Merchants’ is applicable outside of ‘gender’ denominations, material objects can ascribe the qualities of merchants, intentionality is not required as frequently things/’beings’/objects sell ‘themselves’ ‘unconscious’ of ‘themselves’; perhaps slightly reckless use then however referred in the sense of selling their bodies/minds/ to capital, possessed by capital (much could be instantiated & compared to the witch-like inquisition of frenzied hysterics, although here the conquistadors were persecuting their own repressed symptoms in the ‘other’. Perhaps ergo anyone fascinated with occultism has a degree of ‘spiritual’ malaise-meaning interruption of the real/absurd has irreversibly occurred, where the subjects responds by trying to fetishise the body having-become object (rituals, chants, ‘glorified’ objects, womb-‘protective’ circles/pentagrams [explains why such people are slandered as seen as infantile, although every space has womb-like connotations, e.g., cars shielding the singular autonomy from otherness in movement & stasis, rooms of all kinds which is phonetically similar], light by candles to drive out symbolic darkness/void as the real/otherness; all these precisely indicate what was alluded to semi-consciously in the writing above) to protect from difficult & often fatally severe results of inquiry (confirms the ‘self’-destructive resultant ‘drive’ that everyone has to varied intensities, habitual recurrences, with different instruments applied; currency being the prime elemental ‘guardian’ – although the real/otherness always inevitably interrupts, ‘identity’ is permanently transformed, see Franz Mesmer 1800s).

In this instance -K being the primary referent, signifier, advertising sign, the sole product himself [for every authorial displayed portrait/photo double their vanity ‘love’-of-’self’-image score; >10=immodestly egoistic], to be consumed by the cannibalistic impulsive ‘nature’ of capital (‘dog eat dog’, blood a figurative interruptive-fluid). ‘Obviously’ -K could be more extensively critiqued in multi-layered viewpoints/modes of analysis/fields & theoreticians although it shouldn’t difficult to identify just-some systematic flaws that crumbles ‘his’ entire structural thesis of ‘Rich Dad, Poor Dad’.

‘Ridicule’ effected for while refraining from ad hominems, comments to challenge authorial (& person, regardless of if fiction/non-fiction) character will emerge eventually since writing creations are an affirmation/minimally a resurfacing of theory/knowledge/ideas etcetera so can be ‘justifiably’ critiqued here.