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RE: Paradise or Death – Why so serious?

in #writing6 years ago

Very nice, incredibly provoking title, love it! Your writing style is very approachable and conversational, you had some great ideas about what to take. I never play those games, so I kind of suck at it. Your bucket brigade worked perfectly. Good post!

Now the critique. Too many words. Sorry, I know, I've been writing novels each day, but I think I've shared actionable information throughout. I love your stream of consciousness writing, but if you'd tighten it up a bit, I think more people would get to the vote bar. Consider bullet listing some of it, using subheads to break it up a bit. I know, I know, I hate this critique as well, but , brevity is the soul of wit. Nicely done, thanks for playing along! Can't wait to see tomorrow's posts, you guys are killing it!

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