Be part of the solution

Every day we go through multiple situations, from some we would say simple to others very complicated. In addition, by living in society, we influence each other in both positive and negative attitudes and communications, even more so in a time when technology has advanced to the point that allows our interaction with others through multiple channels and large scale: Social Networks, Digital Media, etc. That is to say that each word of ours, whether written or oral, whether in person or virtual, is going to be a contribution so that the circumstances and the environment that surrounds us are better or worse. Therefore, in each area of ​​our society-family, workplace, community, city, country, etc. -and in the midst of existing problems, each one of us is going to become part of the solution to those problems, or in part of them.

Here are some comments and analysis of aspects that will show us how we will be placing ourselves in one of those two groups: the solutions or the problems.

By working continuously according to the first four we will be part of the problem; by doing so according to the last four, we will be part of the solution.

On the other hand, one of the fundamental tools that we have when we are in the midst of conflicts is our ability to listen to others. And we say listen, not just hear, because listening involves intentionally focusing our attention on what the other person is saying. When we do it, we contribute to diminish the resistance of this, and better yet: as we do more, we will change both our interlocutor and us, and so we can both enter into a harmony that will greatly improve the chances of finding the desired solutions to the problems we are dealing with.

Another important factor is kindness or lack of it. How it changes everything when done with kindness! When we are kind, the best of each one of us in our relationships comes to light. And even better, it only depends on each of us and our willingness to put this positive attitude into practice. And while it is true that in the conflictive world in which we live, in which there are many discourteous and unfriendly people, it will not be easy to maintain a constant attitude of kindness on our part, with effort and perseverance we can achieve it, with the conviction of the fruit so positive of such attitude.

A vital change that we will have to undergo to be part of the solutions is to focus on correcting the mistakes, what is wrong, instead of trying to attribute the blame. In this case we can keep in mind a phrase of the writer William Arthur Ward: It is wise to direct your anger towards problems, not towards people; focus your energies on the answers, not on the excuses. If we practice this valuable advice frequently, we will place ourselves on the path of true solutions to problems. By the way, when applying this advice and if we have sufficient maturity, in this way we can join efforts with other people with whom we can even disagree, partial or total; and we can do it because we will not be orienting ourselves to go after the guilty parties, but rather to the confluence of common interests and ideas that lead us to the authentic remedies of the many problems we have. We could add here that another change will have to be in the focus of our discussions, since the only certain way to end a discussion is not based on who is right, but on what is right.

It should be noted that many times it happens that it is not that we are not seeing the solution, but that we are not seeing the problem. And to begin to see the problem it is going to be necessary that we recognize that each and every one of us has a part, be it little or much, in the origin of said problem, and / or in that it is maintained and prolonged in time, and therefore also in the true solution of it. Finally, instead of complaining, let's focus on finding solutions to the problems we face, and on being very grateful for the many we do not have to confront, keeping in mind that the circumstances could always be worse than those we face at any time. life. If we do not look a little backwards.