When shopping gets weird: A visit to the local antique thrift store (Part 1)

Hey there! I'm back again with another one of these weird thrift shopping posts. I've discovered over time that you can really find some strange things while you go to thrift stores, as you may have noticed if you've seen one of my past posts on this topic. However, neither of the posts I made before even come close to the weird/ridiculous shit that I have found at a local antique store that we happened to stumble across a few weeks back. I don't quite remember how we managed to find or hear about this place, I only know that the day we walked in there a third of my soul was sucked out of my asshole and never seen again... this place has some of the most crazy shit I've ever seen for sale before. 

And, you might be saying "But, Deadspace, surely you're aware that they sell dog penis shaped dildo's online, right? How could this stuff be any weirder?" And, to that I say "Why the fuck are you looking at those you fucking freak? Get the hell out of my post before I piss in your face." But, on a serious note, a lot of the items I found in this place while being weird are also really cool. There were plenty of things I saw that either just impressed me making me wish I had the spare funds to grab some stuff, or just made me have a big, dumb smile on my face while trying to hold back my laughter. There was so much of it in fact that I took roughly 85 or so pictures, meaning we're going to be in for a long ride of posts on this place. (And, I didn't even get halfway through the fucking store yet!) 

So, lets start this train wreck of a post off, shall we? We'll begin with where I began taking pictures in the store, showing you right off the bat the first things you'll see. 

Starting off this roller-coaster ride is something pretty normal in comparison to the rest. Upon walking around the corner this was the first thing to greet me, a coin collection that is for sale. The majority of these coins are just really old coins or special ones that are worth some money for whatever reason. A few things are of note in this one. Down in the bottom section are John McCain quarters. Why these exists are beyond me, as I think they're some of the dumbest things I've ever seen, and I'm not sure they're worth the extra 50 cents beyond just being a meme. 

In addition to the coin collection for sale here for some reason there are some old figures and what looks to be a a wine cork opener. I would assume these were included because the owner probably spent many nights drinking wine, staring at his alarmingly huge coin collection, wondering where he went wrong. Wondering just what led him to this point in his life where his only hobby is collecting coins and putting them above everything else. The only friends remaining being some weird figures that he rubs on his genitals as he sobs between wine sips. At least that's just an educated guess on my part. But, lets get past this boring ass start and move onto something else! 

Aaaaaand, I guess we're going from 0 to 60 pretty quickly here. From weird figures rubbed on some old, sobbing mans dick, to old time figurines that are fairly racist and would probably drive the average person insane these days. I was honestly shocked at first site when I saw these, just because they were so unexpected. Especially when they're just hanging out with Charlie Brown and the Peanuts gang, proving what I always thought. FUCKING CHARLIE BROWN IS A RACIST COMMUNISTS. FUCK YOU CHARLIE BROWN. Anyways, I noticed the tag on one of the figures says it's from Hong Kong, which helped make a bit more sense of it. I'm sure all of the lead paint on it would be delicious for the young kids that it was intended for. 

You'll also notice some pretty creepy little figures in the background here. Further proving my point that whoever owned these was more than likely a serial killer who was never caught and has retired, no longer requiring these creepy/weird things to horrify their victims before slaughtering them. Thankfully there wasn't much else in this little section, so we can just move on and pray that we never have to look into the dead, cold eyes of that kid in a bunny outfit. Stalking you, watching you, always knowing what you're doing as he slowly creeps up onto you with a carrot in hand, hoping to devour your soul...Wait, what were we talking about? I dunno, fuck it. Lets move on! 

Oh, hell yeah. Now we're getting into the weird but cool section at the start. This whole section was pretty much chalk full of medical equipment which I found fascinating. My fiancee was also heavily intrigued by a lot of the items in this cabinet. The top right side of the shelf has some embalming fluids and tools available. These are things that you would find straight out of a funeral home. There's also a small animal skull for sale here, but I've no idea on what it is. Perhaps a Chupacabra skull, or the skull of an Elf that wandered too far from Santa's workshop. 

Underneath there's a sign stating that they're looking to buy any weird/creepy oddities and to take a card from the counter up front if you have any for sale. You might also notice the FUCKING VASE THAT HAS HUMAN JAW BONES TIED AROUND IT. I dunno, it is kind of hard to see though. It is pretty interesting that something like that is just hanging out here, but hey, I guess that is artwork for someone out there. I, on the other hand, will be staying away from that as I believe owning that thing makes you a top suspect for any and every murder case that happens in your area. 

On the left side of the cabinet we found some medical/dental equipment, something that my fiancee was super hyped about (She had aspirations about becoming a dentist for a few years, so she studied a bit about it and has a pretty general interest in dental equipment). You'll probably notice the mold of someones teeth, of course next to actual fucking teeth that are attached to a small board. I think this was one of the more odd items we saw, and I had to talk my fiancee down from trying to buy them since we really don't have cash for just having weird shit around. 

There are also some old dental textbooks underneath and behind the teeth and mouth mold. And, for some reason there is a mortle and pestle for sale here as well. Perhaps the owner was into witchcraft and used these to create poison to get their hands on those god damn teeth that are just sitting there for sale. I don't even fucking know what's going on with this display anymore. Hell, underneath all this medical shit are a bunch of vintage chocolate boxes. Why the fuck would you put those there? Yeah, I'm really in the mood for vintage chocolate decorations after looking at morgue equipment and old ripped out teeth. Sure, why not you fucking loons.

Oh, you thought the chocolate boxes were misplaced? Yeah, that's fucking child's play compared to this photo. Seriously, this area was the most confusing and somewhat disturbing area that I ran across I think. Here we have an assortment of things that honestly do make me think someone criminally insane is running this section of the store. We have a human skull cut in half for study next to a box of disarticulated bones. This fits well with the other items that are nearby. However, lets look at what's actually around this shit...A fucking butt plug device used for...reaming an animals asshole? Why is this a thing? Why is this even near the skull and bones? What is happening? 

Oh, and to keep you entertained while you study over the human anatomy or shove a orange plastic butt plug up a poor animals ass, we have some real treats for you! You can either try to prophesize the fate of the crypto market using some Tarot cards, or if you're REALLY ballsy enough you can attempt to do several different Starsky and Hutch jigsaw puzzles. You know, while I was at this place I was kinda overloaded with visual stimulus so I didn't really understand the layout of these items or why some of this shit was for sale. And, I can definitely say even now I'm still in the same place not understanding what the fuck I'm looking at. But, the show must go on. At least for one more picture before I end the first part of this abominable series. 

On the opposite side of the aisle was just one little area where they only had a few items for sale. Oh, but don't worry, they're just as strange and oddly placed as every other god damn thing in this post. On the left we have some kind of strange chemical concoction called Absorbine used by veterinarians sometime in the mid 1900's I would assume. It apparently has a numerous amount of uses ranging from treating cuts and wounds, all the way up to toning muscles apparently. Oh, of course with only a minor dose of cancer development with each use. Don't you worry about it. Or else. 

The bottle on the right is another diabolical creation used to treat mange for the human scalp as well as animal skin. I can't say that I'd put this shit anywhere near my head if I had mange, for fear of it being Xenomorph blood in a jar that melts through my skull. But hey, more power to you if you used this shit and are still alive! And, of course what wouldn't this display area be without having a misplaced item to entertain you while you die from cancer or acid blood. Thankfully they have some vintage plastic checkers sitting around for you to play checkers. Oh boy! Just what I've always fucking wanted when I'm trying to treat my fungal problems or my GOD DAMN MANGE. CHECKERS, HELL YEAH. 

Alright, that's it. I need to take a break from this shit. This was just the first 15-20 feet of the store, and I'm pretty sure you already have a pretty good idea of the weirdness of the items for sale in this place. I don't know how many entries there will be in this series, especially if I go back and document the other half of the store. I might try to cherry pick through my pictures and just make a few posts instead of a lot. But, it will be hard because this place is probably a haven for undead nazi's and lizard men from what I can tell so far. 

Anyways, yeah. Thanks for stopping by to check out part 1 of this series. Appreciate you taking the time to read through all this crap. Take care until next time!