Diminutive Short Stories Selection #3

Sex dream. Text from mom

Part Two

I had a sex dream about a black chick. I can't wait to tell that woman that called me racist.

I Don't Know

I don't know how he got shot in the back with a shotgun falling off a four wheeler. Was he shot twice? Maybe someone walked by and shot him out of spite. Anyway I was heres (sic).

Part Two

I don't know how you hit yourself in the back of the head with a skillet while you got your knife in one hand and fork in the other. Anyway she was heres (sic).

Sweet Dream

Lady Gaga's sitting at a table in the common area on the second floor of the CSUB library away from the private rooms where I saw Bloomberg say in an interview to 'pay your taxes.' She's in her full get up with platinum hair and loud makeup. We know each other now and have warm feelings while we talk. Robert Linder walks off with the copy of the Roman Pocket Reader I left on another table, annoying. Then we are at the outside of the exclusive Domino club and restaurant on the first floor of a nice hotel. Chris Noth can't get a table. Lady Gaga has to wait. I flirt with the Maitre De. He's the black assistant to Mugatu from Zoolander. I tell him what Lady Gaga is like, how demanding and demur. We smile and nod, that way. Sweet dream.

"Send Kenneth Starr to prosecute Gabby Giffords for tax evasion."

President Donald Trump