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RE: [Brutal Short Story] - A struggling door-to-door salesman takes things one step too far
Huh. Very brutal. Too brutal for my taste...
I liked the story very much until he threw the apple, afterwards it was just a copy of senseless exaggeration reminding me of GoT, Spartacus, Tarantino... Which I don't like at all.
But still, well written and nice to read. ;)
Yeah, I guess it is a bit too brutal in a way... Shouldn't have made him throw the apple and escalate matters further then... And like, just make him walk away after that mental breakdown... But when a thought of throwing the apple crossed my mind I just went with it. I don't really have much time to write lately, roughly an hour a day.. and I want to publish a story every day, so this is what I'm left with. No refining of the ideas, just writing them as soon as they cross my mind. :3
I'm glad you enjoyed the rest and that you enjoy my writing style. I'm thinking of making the next story positive, not brutal/negative... I'll see... Need a good writing prompt first ^^
Hehe. I understand. The life of an chaotic artist. :D Seems a bit familiar...
Well it's your creation anyway, I'm just describing my taste. :D
I've been working on an other traditional Slovenian song. It's about the last night between two lovers before the guy is drafted into the troops for 7 years. Afterwards the girl sadly believes her man wouldn't return - after a while she thinks he had fallen in battle...
That is the original-traditional part to which I added some of my own lyrics, twisting the story.
The guy would return back to marry her but is scared she might have forgotten about him.
This is the ending of the song and I would ask you to write a short story about what happens when the war veteran finally arrives at where he hopes he'd find his fiancé. :)
Here is example of a traditional performance of the upper mentioned song:
Otherwise, I'm working on your song... It's getting funny. :)
If lucky I might have a demo ready in the week to follow.
I'll see what I can do, but no promises for today, because today is completely stuffed, don't even have that one hour :<
But tomorrow for sure! I think I already have a general idea forming ^.^ So far it's positive, but who knows how it turns out in the end ;P
I take it you would prefer something a bit less brutal than this story? :p
Oh you do? Amazing! :D I can't wait! :D Oh my oh my oh my oh my GIMMEEEE :P You're just teasing meeeeeee, so unfair :P
Ooooh, danger zone. :)
I prefer mega happy endings, not the usual happy end but happiness in superlatives. :D Hehe.
Ok, I wont tease any more. Sry. :p
I'll make sure to get you the opposite! ;P Just to punish you for the teasing :P
I'll refrain myself from answering that trap question.
Hahaha, just do as you feel mate. :D