How to Pretend to Be Busy, Without Pretending - My Civil Service #14

The easiest way to look busy at work, is to not be on the sight of the other people at all. Like in the archive room where nobody can see me. While putting files inside folders, I hit a podcast from my earbuds so that I don't go completely crazy with the void I suddenly have on my hands; my "to-be-archived" folder's empty. I think about scanning the few last drawers' alphabetical order I haven't yet done. But I don't care right now, might as well dilute my day with doing nothing - like adding more water to a cup of coffee to make it look bigger, busier, than it is - because the drawers will not be leaving me for over 4 months. Or rather I won't be leaving them.

Here, in this room I can dilute my coffee, to sip more often, like I was a busy man. To look like a busy man, without actually looking like anything. Maybe I should sip less often, only holding the coffee is enough to make me look busy.

I didn't care that much about coffee. "But you need coffee." I insisted this is not true and I couldn't see the point of forcing it to me.

"Other people like coffee, so you should look like one too to please others and not make them feel like you're despising them for not taking coffee yourself."

There shouldn't be anyone to hold the coffee for, they know there is only so much to brew.

But then you still give in and take a cup just for the sake of avoiding the stupid line of conversation.

"Where's your coffee?"

It's much easier to just hold the cup so that the answer is obvious regardless if the inside is holding nothing but thin coffee's watermark of the grim outside world distorted onto the bottom.

The good thing with this, is that nobody is going to ask "do you have coffee in there?" Well, what do you think I'm holding it for?

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I sit on the floor, in my own cup of endless source of dilute. Who knew a room full of thousands of memos of alcoholics could be the most peace I could find at work?

So I laid down on the floor with my most comfortable hoodie that I own, laying my head covered like a glove. And gosh, was that floor on the Monday afternoon the most blissful thing ever. Almost zoning out from the conversation still going on in my ears, I almost thought that someone might come in and see me lying on the floor, but I didn't really care to grab on that thought. If someone came, I would've heard it.

I'd rather not pretend, it gets tiring after while. But when you can pretend this comfortably, I don't mind.