i failed to slay his demons

Love is mighty.

I celebrate its simple baby steps and its impressive hail mary throws. It is beautiful in so many incarnations that it is mystifying, captivating and as terrifying as my favorite roller coaster.... at moments.

Ahhhh....so this is what it’s like to travel at angel speed??? Wow!

What else is made of tireless enthusiasm and creativity? Fires up the confetti cannons and yet voice like a guiding meditative prayer? What else do we build that can be our song and our castle?

Love builds a world.

I felt a tinge of sadness re-reading “the perfect tomorrow that you left behind”. It is not just about a love affair that loses it’s voice; it’s about the silence that consumes friendship.... where that space of happy memories becomes corrupted and recollection becomes broken.

Kindness slowly finds alien words and thoughts. Tears meet indifference. What was once precious is no longer worth protecting.

I’ve failed at halting the “ritual”.

It’s like watching a spiritual “sacrifice” where you watch someone you love place themselves upon an alter, watch them wrestle with an invisible opponent and then decide to simply light the kindling, sit on the flames, and cry. If that’s surreal enough, the most confounding part is being told you’re wonderful while you and the world you built together gets dismantled.

I was a star shining in their universe. It didn’t matter.

I failed to slay his demons.

Life.

Pppppppfffffftttttt.

JNET

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