I hear you. Life is crazy & doesn't make sense sometimes. Peaks & Valleys . We're all going through something. I find giving in to it helps, not fighting it. There's so much pressure out there! Fuck the pressure, life is short, nobody knows what they're doing lol. I know how it feels when you can't shut your thoughts off. You'll find a way, I have many theories about how to feel better but I won't go on because you know yourself better than anyone!