RE: ULOG #7: Transformative Processes
I can relate. I start a post sometimes and it is too emotional for me to actually share it with anyone. I have a few posts on my computer like that. But, I go back and re-read them every once in a while and choose to post them at a later time after I have worked through whatever emotion I have attached to that post. Writing has helped me a lot in my grief and I continue to write about daily life because I have found that I enjoy it so much now.
Kira sounds like a wonderful soul and I'm sorry that she is gone from this world. My dogs are my world but they are getting older now and I think about them leaving me sometimes. I may be a mess when that happens eventually. I'm glad you were able to love animals again, it sounds like your rat friends are very blessed to have you in their lives.
Thank you for such a sweet comment.
Ivy
Yes, they were my little healers in so many ways... I also learned to say "good bye" with them... kind of... of course it always hurt. With Kira it was way before her time and kind of traumatic, I know you understand what I mean that it was a case of "not closure". It took me time to accept and review all the "what ifs". I wondered long if I failed her, if I could have prevented it... but she was gone, my sweet daughter. I never had kids, she was my baby. Then I gathered my tears and decided to "break" with the life I had... I had studied biology which I didn't like (imagine I like rats...! can you imagine me in a lab? hmm nop) I made my first album with an instrumental "Now that you're gone" It was a song but I could not sing it... in my second album she had "Good Night Kira" a proper farewell. And now, now I'm grateful, for every second... and I understand that's the flow in universe... events unfolding constantly and us along with them. I thank her, even the sorrow I underwent... because I understood love is lasting. I love her still.
big hugs!
Animals can be incredible healers. My two dogs have helped me heal in so many ways the past 8 years. They always teach me new things about love and life. Life is difficult when we don't get closure that we feel we deserve so I can understand that. I love that you have honored Kira in the ways that you have. I believe that she is still with you and still supporting you in all you do to help others. Much love and many hugs to you.
Ivy