Poetry for Ulog - AM TRYING NOT TO SAY I GIVE UP

I GIVE UP
"am trying to do more than just Give Up"

I've heard don't give up
I've heard don't give in
I've heard there's always an answer for everything
But its hard
An not trying to discourage you
Am not trying to make you quit the race
Am just saying everything that i hope would give my head space
It's very easy to fake the life you want to others but it so hard to fake it for yourself
It's so easy for me to say am strong but truth be told am scared
And i ain't talking about dying am talking about leaving this world unheard
I don't want you to ever say she died with a lot of potentials
I don't want you to say if only she had used her voice
So am not really scared of dying
Am scared of not having enough time to use up all my potentials
But how can i stay focus when there is so many things dividing the attention
Like LOVE
Am not sure what you are, are you a friend or a foe
You always come packaged in gold but i end up opening up to find thorns
They said you can't be perfect but your imperfection is killing me
Love!
People use you to get to me, to get to my good side and i let them cos i always trust you
But now am thinking that I've had enough
You know what this isn't even the first time i said I've had enough but
I keep giving you another chance
I keep letting myself believe that this time it could
I keep saying to myself what if am giving up on the real one
But am afraid i just let myself be deceived another time
"Well if he walks out of your life then he was never supposed to be in your future"
Ha really but does he really care about how he just shattered my presence and if i was strong enough to be functional for the future
Well now the only thing that keeps me going is the music the lyrics the melody
Now I've found a way to put filter on my messed up inside

now all you can see is beauty cos I've found a way to suppress my pain to be entertaining for you
I know you love when i sing when i speak what i write so am going to be strong for you cos I've realised that even in my Imperfections am perfect for you
But I hope the weight gets lifted soon
The world needs to hear what i have to say
But with no support how would i promote my message to the world
But I believe its gonna be okay because all it takes is time and believe am gonna keep pushing till i get to the end even with i all this trials i still have that conviction deep down that its impossible for me to fail am a rear germ you might not see that now but time will tell
So talking spiritually and in what i believe in God doesn't give you what you can't handle so guess I would me okay
So am not gonna give the trials power over me
Cos a this trials gonna make me what you cant resist tomorrow.

Thanks for reading this i hope you enjoyed it the whole write up come from my heart i don't fake it cos i believe there are steemians going through the same thing, there are steemians who have same thing running through their mind so am not really worried about gaining fan base i just need people who can relate to what's going on in my mind so if you felt this am open for advice i ain't got it all figured out yet so please comment and up vote
thanks to @ulog for this opportunity
#ORIGINAL PHOTOS BY ME @princessvanessa