in ulog •  last year 

Hi guys today is another weekend
1st day of September for that matter.
Its in weekend like this my neighbor mama nkiru will want to kill the whole neighborhood with her palm kernel stew and bitter leaf soup.
This woman sha knows how to make the whole compound seem like there is an owambe around.
Her varieties of soup every weekend have made her more popular around my neighborhood even more than the village chief.

Its been six months since I moved to this neighborhood and the topic of mama nkiru savagery aroma has been the daily talk around. Now you will be thinking we are jobless abi No!! Far from it jareh, I am just describing the magnitude of the predicament I have been faced with for the last six months.
The problem is not with mama nkiru infecting the air with her nose sniffing soups, it is the fact that after preparing such food she will just jejely carry the food and put inside the house, then in the evening after serving potbellied pa innor her husband, as he is fondly called, they will start laughing an unbearable laugh and this always gets to me cos my room is just adjacent to their window. Talk is around town that pa innor actually married mama nkiru because of her skill in handling kitchen ingredients.

So earlier today something very interesting happened,
Mama nkiru was at it again with her delicacy, she had gone to the market earlier to get her secret ingredients, but this time Eric decided to show her pepper. Eric is one of those guys around That sha knows how to get away with things. I remember one night when we were so broke and dinner was not showing hope of coming that night. And my sweetheart could not leave the house to bring food. This dude went as far as yanking two of our landlord chickens and with out conscience he boiled two of the chicken's egg, being the Christian I am, I had to pray for forgiveness before eating that unholy blessing that day . In a way Eric has been the most pained by mama nkiru scandals, he has been complaining bitterly as one, who is being deprived his human rights. So today he told me he had a golden plan about food for the evening, I was unsure how he was gonna do that but I knew whatever plan he had was not a good one but I sha just played along.
Its 4pm and mama nkiru has started cooking and Eric has been pressing his phone out side since she started, in my room I could hear the sizzling oil, I could tell she was frying some goat meat, and fresh fish, it was not long before the aroma of Afang soup filled the air.. With the heaviness of the aroma u could tell that every ingredient in that soup answered present.

Mama nkiru might have forgotten something inside the house that took her in, Bam!! Was what I heard Eric had got off his sit straight to were mama Nkiru was cooking, he had hijacked the whole pot of soup and piam!!! He was off. Not sure what was going on it was as if the gentleman had disappeared into space, five minutes later mama Nkiru was out to check for her soup.She came out to meet an empty stove. Having stayed in Lagos all her life you could no longer tell that mama Nkiru was an Igbo woman, she has being drowned in the culture of the Yoruba's that you will argue with anybody who told you she was Igbo. I could see her murmuring to herself and pointing to the stove were she had left her afang soup, it was not long before she started taking off her clothes and raining courses on who took her pot of soup. Me I "kuku" don't like talking so there was no way she could come and ask me if I took her pot of soup, I was just sitting were I was observing what was going on, it was not long people had already gathered to see what was going on, after she was done explaining I could see some of the neighbors smiling, I could swear I heard somebody say "na im good for her".

Its past 8pm, somebody was knocking on my door, haaa!!! Who is this one again, i thought to myself, me that don't usually get visitors, so reluctantly I went to get the door, boom!!! It was Eric with a pot in his hands, and black nylon, without inviting him in he jumped in shouting "oboy put water for fire we make eba" I hesitated so he decided to make the "eba" himself. So, he done making the eba and invited me to come join him, initially I didn't wanted to, but my dear the way that Afang was looking that night you will deny your origin to have a taste of that Afang, I sha asked God for forgiveness before eating that soup, even if those courses will want to work I no it was not me that remove the pot of soup from the stove....LOL

Thanks for reading

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